heavily snipped:
If pretending a convectional married life
it´s even difficult living together sometimes, so much more in long distance.
- more snipping -
If pretending to have a couple with castity oath meeting her/him wainting like an angel :angel: it would much better to present for stupidest guinnes or just :shoothea:
I do not agree with both, but rather think that it depends on *the circumstances* you meet:
- If you are in the service and do service abroad, and if your gal gotta know you that way, no prob.
- If
both are in service or have passed service (as pointed out above), better: In general, tough and mil minded women have a (slightly better only
) understanding on how men tick, you might indeed fare better.
- As far as being difficult living together, *that* is exactly where, from my POV, the problems start, I think it is easier to live a whole marriage half away thean being stuck together all the time:
While you do tours abroad (be it in service, mariner, photojournalist as myself, or whatever) and leave your gal alone, both have to have the necessary trust or it would not work out anyway - and this includes unerstanding an occasional "fidelity" slip IMHO, we are all human and feel lonely sometimes if we are month and month alone... (my and my wifes song from this time: "
Cultured Pearls: Kissing the sheets" http://www.ohlmer.es/dls/favorito.m4a , lyrics appended in English and Spanish for Solideo, describes it pretty well, everything in it of such type of family life), you make it through these times.
The poin being that *both* basically (even if mentally close or even soulmates) manage thier part of marital life *ALONE*, and get used to it.
Now, skip your job, come home permanently, and you will find out rapidly that you are either "in the way" (because the gal has learned over the years to have her own TO&E up and does not easily adjust to "foreign" interference, even worse with kids around) or might even be asked (has happened to me) after a 120 hours week tour of 3 month to "get your ass moving and build that f***" whatever needs to be built/scraped/cleaned at that moment despite you feel wasted from your tour...
From my POV, the mix of freedom, liberty and responsability verus complicity, intimacy and else is well digested and tolerated in an *intermittant* long range relationship as described above with the right love at your side, as both will get a bit of everything possible, and
most of the time you will both enjoy your setup, which is more than I can say about the marriages I have witnessed around me.
My 2c (having been 27 yrs constantly abroad 7 months a year in 2 tours: 4 month and 3 month; at home 5 month a yr, in tours of 3 month - winter- and 2 month summer)
Rattler
Appenix: Lyrics to "Cultured Pearls: Kissing the sheets"
i spent the whole night long
(Pasé toda la noche)
on my hotel-phone
(en mi hotel por teléfono)
- a letter’s too long -
(- una carta seria demasiado larga -)
don’t you know
(ya lo sabes, no?)
we talked, we laughed
(hablabamos, estabamos riendonos )
and sighed
(y suspirabamos)
kissing the air
(besando el aire)
said good-bye…
(diciendo aidos…)
i m never the first to
(Nunca soy el primero)
hang-up the phone
(de colgar,)
i d rather kiss instead…
(preferiria besarte…)
but isn’t this just
(pero no es esta simplemente)
the way we live
(nuestra manera de vivir?)
CHORUS:
I might be kissing the sheets
(es posible que iria besando las sabanas)
i might be hugging the pillow
(es posible que iria abrazando la almohada)
all night long
(durante toda la noche)
but i don’t mind
(pero no me importa)
cause i have you on my mind…
(porque te tengo conmigo in mi mente…)
i might be kissing the sheets
(es posible que iria besando las sabanas)
i might be hugging the pillow
(es posible que iria abrazando la almohada)
all night long
(durante toda la noche)
but i don’t mind
(pero no me importa)
’cause i have you on my mind…
(porque te tengo conmigo in mi mente…)
…all night long;
(…durante toda la noche
i don’t mind
(no me importa)
’cause i’ll kiss in time (porque voy a besarte quando haya tiempo)
it’s time, my train has arrived
(y es tiempo, mi tren ha llegado)
i take a slow step inside
(lo subo lentamente)
how time has passed by
(que rapido ha pasado nuestro tiempo junto)
don’t you know
(lo sabes, no?)
we only had a day
(parece que solo hemos tenido un dia)
we say hello
(para decir hola)
who can’t stay
(a quien que no puede quedarse)
i’m glad we had this
(Me alegro que tuvimos este…)
day anyway
(…dia de todas maneras)
we’d rather kiss instead
(prefeririamos besarnos en vez de partir)
But isn’t this just…
(Pero no es esta simplemente…)
…the way we live
(…nuestra manera de vivir?)
CHORUS