tomtom22
Chief Engineer
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[/FONT][FONT="]Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
[/FONT][FONT="]When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.[/FONT][FONT="]
A penny saved is a government oversight[/FONT][FONT="].[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight; because by then your body[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement..[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
He who hesitates is probably right.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Did you ever notice:[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="] The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are ' XL.'[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
If you can smile when things go wrong , you have someone in mind to blame.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.[/FONT][FONT="]
There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it.. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Did you ever notice:[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="] When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs.'[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way... [/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]I've traveled a long way, and some of the roads weren't paved![/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then[/FONT][FONT="],[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]you forget to pull up your zipper.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]It's worse when you forget to pull it down.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT="]Dear Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder, [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT][FONT="]and your hand over my mouth... [/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
[/FONT][FONT="]Amen!![/FONT]
[/FONT][FONT="]Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
[/FONT][FONT="]When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.[/FONT][FONT="]
A penny saved is a government oversight[/FONT][FONT="].[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight; because by then your body[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement..[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
He who hesitates is probably right.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Did you ever notice:[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="] The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are ' XL.'[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
If you can smile when things go wrong , you have someone in mind to blame.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.[/FONT][FONT="]
There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it.. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Did you ever notice:[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="] When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs.'[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way... [/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]I've traveled a long way, and some of the roads weren't paved![/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then[/FONT][FONT="],[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]you forget to pull up your zipper.[/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]It's worse when you forget to pull it down.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]
[/FONT][FONT="]Dear Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder, [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT][FONT="]and your hand over my mouth... [/FONT][FONT="] [/FONT][FONT="]
[/FONT][FONT="]Amen!![/FONT]