Things that do not go together....

[Yossarian]

Things that do not go together....​

Motor Vehicles
Bottle Rockets
Malt Liquor​

Lawn care equipment
Yellow jackets
Coors Light​

Farm Machinery
Electric Fences
Canadian Crown 16​

Forklifts
Interstate On Ramps
Johnny Walker Red Label​

Ex wives
Their new husbands
Strawberry pucker​

Spider Man Costumes
Wire Welding machines
Mad Dog 20/20​

Suspended CDL License
"Borrowed" Spotting Truck with plans to stop by a Mexican post office
Pulque​

An aluminum baseball bat with 700 used golf balls
A snowblower
Newcastle Ale​

400 yards of rubber hose to be used as bungee cord
A abandoned bridge spanning over a dry creek bed
Samuel Adams​

Descion to go streaking
Police K-9 Units
Wine Coolers​

Underarmor underwear and flip flops
Chain link fences
Captain Morgan​

Descion to urinate out the windshield of an side by side ATV
A high velocity of speed
Jim Beam Kentucky Bourbon​

Concrete mixer trucks
Those poles in the liquor store parking lot
Home made blueberry wine​

A 20 feet wide drainage ditch and any Steve McQueen movie
A Honda 50 cc mini bike
Knock Off Jager Brand​

Two mail order Thai Hookers
Sixty jars of stolen peanut butter
The High Life​

Bleach and Ammonia
Small cramped Port-A-John
Schnapps​

Velveeta Cheese
Bear Traps
Pine apple Home Brew Juice​

A penny rolled in bubble gum stuck in an electrical outlet
A copper clothes hanger
Crown Royal​

Lying to your probation Officer
Telling Him
Guinness​

Starting a grease fire
Urinating on it
Jack Daniels Old No. 7​

Finally as who at the time I thought was my wife asked me if I noticed any patterns in all these experiences, ​

I replied with a simple "un uh".​

Then she kindly reminded me she was my state appointed therapist, not my wife...​

And that contrary to my belief this was not the Hampton Inn and Suites Hotel Lobby.... ​

And that I was in Custodial Rehab.​