Bears and Religion

Missileer

Active member
A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all
served as chaplains to the students of
Northern Michigan University in
Marquette. They would get together two or three times a week for
coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.

One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment.
They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and
attempt convert it. Seven days later, they're all together to discuss their
experiences.


Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has
arious bandages, goes first. "Well," he says, "I went into the woods to
find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the
Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap
me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him, and Holy
Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out
next week to give him first communion and confirmation."

Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and
both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he
claimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out
out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from
God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took
HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another
and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and
BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became gentle as a lamb.
We spent the rest of the week in Fellowship, feasting on God's Holy Word,
and praising Jesus."

They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was
in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and out of him.
He was in bad shape. The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it,
circumcision may not have been the best way to start.

 
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