General
Leaps tall buildings in a single bound
Is more powerful then a locomotive
Is faster than a speeding bullet
Walks on water
Gives policy to God
Colonel
Leaps short buildings in a single bound
As powerful than a locomotive
Just as fat as a speeding bullet
Walks on water if sea is calm
talks w/ God
Lt. Colonel
Leaps short buildings w/ a running start and favorable winds
Almost as powerful as locomotive
Faster than a speeding bb
walks on indoor swimming pools
talks w/ God if special reguest chit is approved
Major
Barely clears Quonset huts
looses tug-of-war w/ locomotive
Can fire a speeding bullet
Swims well
Occasionally addressed by God
Captain
Makes high marks when trying to leap tall buildings
Is run over by locomotives
Can sometimes handle a gun w/ out inflicting self injury
Doggy paddles
Talks to animals
1st Lt.
Runs into buildings
Recognizes locomotives 2 out of 3 times
Is not issued ammo
Can stay afloat if properly instructed in the use of life jacket
Talks to Walls
2nd Lt.
Falls over doorstep when trying to enter building
Bays and says,"Look at the Choo-Choo"
Wets Himself with a water pistol
Plays in mud puddles
Mumbles to himself
NCO's
Lifts buildings and walks under them
Kicks locomotives off the tracks
Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them
Freezes water w/ a single glance
He is God
Leaps tall buildings in a single bound
Is more powerful then a locomotive
Is faster than a speeding bullet
Walks on water
Gives policy to God
Colonel
Leaps short buildings in a single bound
As powerful than a locomotive
Just as fat as a speeding bullet
Walks on water if sea is calm
talks w/ God
Lt. Colonel
Leaps short buildings w/ a running start and favorable winds
Almost as powerful as locomotive
Faster than a speeding bb
walks on indoor swimming pools
talks w/ God if special reguest chit is approved
Major
Barely clears Quonset huts
looses tug-of-war w/ locomotive
Can fire a speeding bullet
Swims well
Occasionally addressed by God
Captain
Makes high marks when trying to leap tall buildings
Is run over by locomotives
Can sometimes handle a gun w/ out inflicting self injury
Doggy paddles
Talks to animals
1st Lt.
Runs into buildings
Recognizes locomotives 2 out of 3 times
Is not issued ammo
Can stay afloat if properly instructed in the use of life jacket
Talks to Walls
2nd Lt.
Falls over doorstep when trying to enter building
Bays and says,"Look at the Choo-Choo"
Wets Himself with a water pistol
Plays in mud puddles
Mumbles to himself
NCO's
Lifts buildings and walks under them
Kicks locomotives off the tracks
Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them
Freezes water w/ a single glance
He is God
