On a mission from above

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Redneck

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An atheist professor was teaching a college class and he told the class that he was going to prove that there is no God. He said, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"

Ten minutes went by. He kept taunting God, saying, "Here I am, God. I'm still waiting." He got down to the last couple of minutes and a Marine just released from active duty and newly registered in the class walked up to the professor, hit him full force in the face, and sent him flying from his platform. The professor struggled up, obviously shaken and yelled, "What's the matter with you? Why did you do that?" The Marine replied, "God was busy; He sent me."
 
I shouldn't do this, but it IS a funny joke.
An atheist dies, and awakens to find himself before the gates of hell. "Oh No! I was wrong, and now I'm in hell!" he thinks.
Well the devil walks up to him and says "We've been expecting you. follow me." So the atheist follows the devil through the gates of hell. They pass through a huge chamber full of screaming tormented souls, flames and pitchforks and lava, the whole bit. The atheist is beside himself with fear. Then they enter a modern airconditioned hallway, with bright pictures on the wall. The hallway leads to a huge room, where eternities biggest party is in full swing. A gorgeous she-demon hands the atheist his favorite drink, made just the way he likes it. Out of the crowd emerge his best friends and long lost buddies.
"Surprise!" they all shout. They then proceed to dance the night away. Sometime later, while talking with some old army buddies the atheist says:
"This is all great, this is the best! There's just one thing that bothers me. When I came in, there was this pit of screaming souls and torture and stuff, what's that all about?"
"Ah," one of his friends says,"that's just for the christians!"
 
o-oh

I beg everybody who reads this to have a sens of humor! Its just a joke, i found it funny....
 
As a non-christian I do not only find it funny, but I do also believe that it's true.. :twisted: ;)
I'll be celebrating in Valhalla, while the rest of you infidels will :firedevi: ! :viking: :cheers: :viking:
 
I'm REALLY glad you guys took this in the spirit it was meant. No harm nor insult intended.
BTW, I could REALLY get behind a good old norse Valhalla scheme. We need Norse chaplains:
"Okay, let's go storm that ridge, and when we're done, gorgeous warrior women will take the slain to the feast halls!"
 
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