Monkeys

Mark Conley

Active member
One day, a lonely man decided to get a animal from the local pet store. he drove to the nearest one, which was located just outside a local Air Force Base, and entered the establishment. To his dismay, all he could find in the cages was monkeys. No dogs. No cats. Just a lot of monkeys.

While looking at this collection and wondering what he would do next, he noticed that a Chief Master Sergeant (CMS) from the Air Base had come into the establishmentat. The Top non-comissioned officer strolled up to the counter and asked the proprieter in a hearty voice "Hey John! Is my line maintenance monkey ready?" John proceeded to go to the back and retrieve a very dour faced speciman and give it to the CMS. The CMS thanked him, paid him a large sheaf of bills, and left the establishment.

Curious, the lonely man asked John how much the man had paid for the monkey. "$5000.00 dollars" was Johns reply. "$5000.00? What makes a monkey worth $5000.00?" the lonely man asked. Looking around, he noticed all the cages held monkeys with enormous pricetags: $3000.00, $5000.00 and even $10000.00 monkeys were in the cages. John, noticing the mans puzzled face, proceeded to tell him all about the monkeys and why they were so expensive.

"What you are looking at is a new Air Force Experiment" John said. "these are all specially trained monkeys, designed to relieve regular airman from duties that are highly dangerous. Take that line maintenance monkey the CMS bought, for instance. He has been to trained to totally go all over the plane from top to bottom, checking it for defects and maintence items, and repairing and restoring the Aircraft to flying shape in just hours. Them $3000.00 dollar monkeys are plane repair specialists. they can fix a whole wing in just under an hour, if the need to. Those $10.000.00 dollar monkeys over there are ordanence specialists. You need your plane armed, or your bombs defused, why just set him loose on the situation.

The lonely man looked around the shop, and spotted a monkey in a cage, kicked back and relaxed, with a $1.000,000.00 dollar price tag on his cage. Stunned, he turned to John and asked "hey John. Whats this $1.000.000.00 dollar monkey do?"

John answered " Well that one is different. All I have ever seen him do is eat, sleep, boss the other monkeys, and play with himself. But his papers say he's a fighter pilot" :D
 
Mark Conley said:
One day, a lonely man decided to get a animal from the local pet store. he drove to the nearest one, which was located just outside a local Air Force Base, and entered the establishment. To his dismay, all he could find in the cages was monkeys. No dogs. No cats. Just a lot of monkeys.

While looking at this collection and wondering what he would do next, he noticed that a Chief Master Sergeant (CMS) from the Air Base had come into the establishmentat. The Top non-comissioned officer strolled up to the counter and asked the proprieter in a hearty voice "Hey John! Is my line maintenance monkey ready?" John proceeded to go to the back and retrieve a very dour faced speciman and give it to the CMS. The CMS thanked him, paid him a large sheaf of bills, and left the establishment.

Curious, the lonely man asked John how much the man had paid for the monkey. "$5000.00 dollars" was Johns reply. "$5000.00? What makes a monkey worth $5000.00?" the lonely man asked. Looking around, he noticed all the cages held monkeys with enormous pricetags: $3000.00, $5000.00 and even $10000.00 monkeys were in the cages. John, noticing the mans puzzled face, proceeded to tell him all about the monkeys and why they were so expensive.

"What you are looking at is a new Air Force Experiment" John said. "these are all specially trained monkeys, designed to relieve regular airman from duties that are highly dangerous. Take that line maintenance monkey the CMS bought, for instance. He has been to trained to totally go all over the plane from top to bottom, checking it for defects and maintence items, and repairing and restoring the Aircraft to flying shape in just hours. Them $3000.00 dollar monkeys are plane repair specialists. they can fix a whole wing in just under an hour, if the need to. Those $10.000.00 dollar monkeys over there are ordanence specialists. You need your plane armed, or your bombs defused, why just set him loose on the situation.

The lonely man looked around the shop, and spotted a monkey in a cage, kicked back and relaxed, with a $1.000,000.00 dollar price tag on his cage. Stunned, he turned to John and asked "hey John. Whats this $1.000.000.00 dollar monkey do?"

John answered " Well that one is different. All I have ever seen him do is eat, sleep, boss the other monkeys, and play with himself. But his papers say he's a fighter pilot" :D
That would be cool if monkeys could really fix air planes just like us humans.:-)
 
It was good!

However, I have heard a "civilian" version - when the monkeys were the programmers skilled in different computer languages and the top priced monkey - a Consultant
 
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