military dna soap opera

jemby

New Member
Hi, i'm in a sticky situation. My Sister inlaw had a relationship with this guy in the military while she was with him she had this other guy on the side. Well She broke it off with the military guy. But before she did that, she found out she was pregnant. She lied to military guy and said she had in utero dna test, even went as far as having her mommy lie for her to the guy, and he believed the mom cause she always appears and says she never lies. I know this is a lie and so does anyone who knows her and her situation. Well military guy believed her and went off fighting the war. Well 2 years later she is with the other guy and he pretty much beats her is everyones guess, she has all signs and behavior. She lives in a camper with 2 kids and her hubby. The hubby is always in and out of jail, and appears to be a drunk/druggie. Well I got sick of seeing this. I feel as though the military guy needs to know there was never any sort of test done. I wouldn't push it but the kid my sister in law had looks like a mini military guy's kid, and he looks nothing like her hubby. And being the situation that the kid lives in poverty and an unstable unloving environment , i'd want the guy to know. What the heck do I do, I tried calling red cross, even iraq to find him. I don't knwo how to get word out to him. I found his family and they say leave him alone and will not tell him. But if you saw what I know about this kid and how his family life is you'd want the real father to prove he is the daddy and get full custody. Anyone have any ideas how to find the guy or even anyone to let him know? i'm just stuck and lost. Any ideas are welcome.
Oh the guy is in the Army, and his name is REMOVED
last known station was going to be Iraq, he was in Germany before. :cry:
 
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If you feel that the child is in danger or at risk you need to contact Child Protective Services, Dept. of Family Services or what ever it's called in your area. Most jurisdictions have " Hot Lines" for abused or neglected juveniles and are listed in the front of the phone book. In my state Juvenile Officers are required to perform investigations on all Hot Line Tips.

Aside from the above it would seem to me that your sister in law made her choice, and it did not turn out well. While that is bad for the child in question it's the mothers responsibility.
Question 1- Who is named as father on the birth certificate? They will be considered the biological father until the case were adjudicated.

Question 2- If your sister in law is a victim of domestic violence why is she not seeking help?

Aside from that the only route there seems to be is a Paternity Suit naming the Solider as father. Which would require your local Court to make inquiries thru JAG.
 
03USMC said:
If you feel that the child is in danger or at risk you need to contact Child Protective Services, Dept. of Family Services or what ever it's called in your area. Most jurisdictions have " Hot Lines" for abused or neglected juveniles and are listed in the front of the phone book. In my state Juvenile Officers are required to perform investigations on all Hot Line Tips.

Aside from the above it would seem to me that your sister in law made her choice, and it did not turn out well. While that is bad for the child in question it's the mothers responsibility.
Question 1- Who is named as father on the birth certificate? They will be considered the biological father until the case were adjudicated.

Question 2- If your sister in law is a victim of domestic violence why is she not seeking help?

Aside from that the only route there seems to be is a Paternity Suit naming the Solider as father. Which would require your local Court to make inquiries thru JAG.

Q,A#1 Unfortunately the guy she's pawning off as the daddy is on the BC. Not the guy I feel and many others feel is the Father.
Q,A#2 My Sister in law has many many issues with men. She feels dependant on men, and has never went through life without a guy.One of her issues I think stem from her own Father being emotionally and verbally abusive to her own Mother, i'm sure this made an impact on her. Ontop of all this, she is from a certain religion that looks down on Females and pretty much says Females are here to make babies and cook.She's all mixed up, has been and probably will be her whole life.

I'd like to get involved but I can't have anyone know its me......... to be honest if I tried and it was private, everyone would suspect me, the whole in law thing is terrible. Her parents are shielding this, and they are major players involved. If they found out they'd tell her, and her hubby is psycho, i'd hate to see what he'd do to my Family.
Its a shame the guy in the military is honorable, and always had his act together, and would be livid if he knew.My hands are tied.
 
Yeah your in a pickle.
Hot line tips are or can be confidental. Thats an option.

With the guy on the birth documents he will considered the bio father unless DNA tests can prove otherwise. Thats where its tricky in that the solider would more than likely have to challenge.

The bottom line is this , and I'm not trying to be harsh. You can only help her if she wants help and is willing to help herself. If the situation is this bad you have to decide whats important.

Having the family teed off at you or the child in a better enviroment.
 
There is a lesson here. So bad luck she made her own bed now let her lie
in it. Yes that was a bit harsh but hell she lied to the poor bloke and now whats to make contact because her life is not what she was expectiing.

Well love stiff shit she should have thought about this before she lied and was cheating.

No tears from me.

The only person that will suffer from all this is the child who didnt asked to be born. I wish peolpe would think before acting.

She dug her own hole so she should sit in it.
 
I'm not feeling sorry for her, infact I think she is lower than any low.
She didn't even want the baby, she tried self abortion, when that didn't work she was putting baby up for adoption before he was born, at the last min. she kept him. She doesn't want to contact the military guy. She'd rather keep living in this hell she likes, because she's white trash and trash sinks to the bottom. I do feel mixed about this, thats why i'm trying to contact the military guy(Not the ex g/f, in any way is trying to contact him). Infact today i'm going to try and get her Husband's court records, anything I can find. I hope it doesn't scare the military guy and think someone is trying to pull something over him and just get money and military benefits. I want him to see what this thing of an ex g/f he knocked up is with and what kind of life his kid is having to deal with. If I find the military guy I hope he wants to do dna tests.........but whatever.
If anyone reading this knows of any good ways to dig up records and the steps I should take, feel free to tell me.
 
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