What Rangers Think of Marines

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JamesK

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Sorry if this offends any Marines. My cousin is ranger qualifyed special forces, he seems pretty crazy, has been doing repeated tours of duty with like a month or something inbetween ever since the troop deployment to afganistan. Ive seen pictures of him dressed up as an afghani its pretty funny. This is a funny joke he taught me. I found it again on this other website.


A little boy was standing in front of a mirror in the restroom at John F. Kennedy Airport, when in walked a Marine staff sergeant, dressed in his dress blues. The little boy turned to the Marine and said, "Wow! Are you a Marine?"
The Marine replied, "Why, yes I am, young man. Would you like to wear my hat?"
"Boy, would I!," said the little boy. He took the hat and placed it on his head and turned to admire himself in the mirror.
As he was looking in the mirror, he heard the door open and through a ray of bright light, a man entered the room. But, this was not just a man -- he was more than a man. He was an Airborne Ranger.
The little boy turned and went over to the soldier. As he approached him, he could see the reflection in his boots. His eyes widened as he stared up at the soldier's chest full of medals and combat ribbons. He tried to speak, but he couldn't. Finally, he took a deep breath, and managed to say, "Excuse me, Sir. Are you an Airborne Ranger?"
The Ranger replied with a thunderous voice, "Why yes, I am!! Would you like to shine my boots?" The little boy smiled, and said, "Oh, no sir!! I'm not a Marine. I'm just wearing his hat!"
 
This one will most likly offend marines. Again my bad.


1.
Marine: At the bar screaming at the top of his lungs "Oooooorah"
with his two buddys before being thrown out by 50 drunk bikers.
Ranger, Special Forces: Isnt at the bar anymore because hes home
with the three marine's dates.
2.
Marine: Thinks hes the toughest killing machine since the t-rex.
Ranger, Special Forces: Is the toughest killing machine, and much
more quiet than a t-rex.
3.
Marine: Approaches oncoming bedowins screaming keeping rifles
trained on them "HANDS ON YOUR HEAD AND HIT THE DECK YOU
MOTHER&^%^%@! WHAT YOU GOT ON YOUR CAMELS YOU TOWEL&@#%@! huh!?!?!? ILL EAT YOUR FACE!!!!!!" is witnessed by a member of
press causing a nationwide controversey.
Ranger, Special Forces: Approaches oncoming bedowins speaking
native language. When close enough recognizes weapons and mortars
in the bags of the camels. Opens fire killing all but the camels,
including the member of the press as to leave no witnesses. Avoids
nationwide controversey and member of press is made a martyr on
the news against terrorism. In reality the country is better off
with one less blood sucker trying to stir up the american public and get a big check in one move.

aftermath: Marine finds videocamera from the journalist. Places the video on youtube laughing at it. Controversy in America ensues.
4.
Marine: Opens fire on a random convoy of civilians claiming that
they are suspected insurgents.
Ranger, Special Forces: Being that they are on a mission dressed
as afghanis, return fire with much more accuracy. Driving the
marines off. Flees the area, mission is classified therefor are not court marshalled.
5.
Marine: Charges in full metal jacket style screaming firing his
SAW with bandoliers he drapped over his shoulders for appearance
before receiving a round in the leg and has to be medevaced.
Ranger, Special Forces: You dont hear them, you dont see them,
your already dead.
extra: Marine: You definately hear them, you definately see them,
and you definately smell them, two miles away before they reach
you. The smell is easy to identify too, like generator fuel, human
fecies, and octopus, being that they were made in the sea they do
seem to have a seafood smell to them. Or it could be the fish they
tried to fry in the generator fuel.
BONUS:
Airforce officer: ......wait, what do these guys do anyways?
 
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