We only date ugly men

We only date ugly men
May 22nd, 2007  
Team Infidel

Topic: We only date ugly men

We only date ugly men

May 22, 2007

MEET the women who find rippling muscles and chiselled good looks a complete turn-off.

Slicking on another layer of lipgloss, Selena Maria slings her bag over her shoulder and struts into the bar.
A sea of dark, handsome heads turn to ogle her. Jaws drop and good-looking men raise their eyebrows or move in to offer her a drink.
But Selena walks on by. She only has eyes for one man. He’s waiting for her in a dark corner. He’s not one of the handsome guys in sharp suits. He’s not even ‘average’.
He’s bald and podgy, with a pock-marked face, and is easily the ugliest man in the room. She sidles into the chair next to him.
‘Hi, gorgeous,’ she purrs. The man’s gargoyle face breaks into a toothless smile.
The good-looking men know they don’t stand a chance.
Selena has dated her fair share of hunks, but has given up on gorgeous guys because they’re dull – both in and out of bed.
‘I can’t imagine anything more boring than classic handsome looks,’ she says. ‘I prefer no teeth, baldness and piercings to model looks. I like celebs such as Adrien Brody and Mackenzie Crook rather than Brad Pitt.
‘Ugly men try harder. They care more about you and treat you like a princess. Good-looking guys are self-obsessed. That’s not attractive.’
And Selena is not alone. In a recent study, sociologist Diane Felmee found only a third of women said looks were the first thing that attracted them to a man. Most preferred a sense of humour or financial and career success.
Researchers at Newcastle University also believe ugly men exist as a way of repairing our gene pool. Women would rather date men with good genes, who can fight disease easily, than a classically beautiful man.
So are good looks really that important? Love It! found three women who definitely don’t think so.

Vanessa ... loves Colin's looks

'Good-looking men are just boring!'
Mum-of-one and model Vanessa Upton, 28, from Southeast London, has been living with Colin Kane, 34, a boxer and car renovator, for four years.
I lay back in my bikini, arched my back and stuck out my breasts to strike an alluring pose. Then click!
‘That’s beautiful,’ the photographer cried. ‘You look absolutely gorgeous.’
As a glamour model, I was used to hearing those words every day. For 13 years, I’ve been constantly surrounded by hot-looking men, too.
People always assumed I’d end up with a gorgeous male model on my arm. But looks alone weren’t enough for me. Most of the male models just didn’t turn me on.
I wanted something more. And then I met Colin. I was working as a ring-card girl at a boxing match.
As I strutted around the ring in a little bikini with a giant card telling everyone what round was next, I couldn’t take my eyes off Colin.
He was a cornerman and looked after one of the boxers in the fight. He had a shaved head, a broken nose – and electric-blue eyes.
And when those eyes met mine, I felt the most incredible sexual charge flash between us.
I couldn’t believe my luck when he stripped down to a pair of shorts. He was taut and toned.
‘Phwoarr!’ I thought. ‘He’s just my type.’ I wanted to rip his clothes off right there and then.
I’ve never been attracted to smooth-looking men.
I’m surrounded by male models at work, and while they’re often lovely guys, the chisel-jawed Italian-stallion look makes me cringe.
They are so very ordinary. I like a man who looks different – intriguing, with something to offer on the inside.
And there’s something about blokes with bald heads that drives me really crazy – especially if they can make me laugh, too.

Happy family ... Vanessa, James and Colin

Colin made me giggle from the second he came over to chat me up that night. He’d heard I had a bad back.
‘How do you fancy a massage?’ he said with a cheeky grin. ‘I’m a sports therapist.’
I turned down his offer, but I took his number and couldn’t stop thinking about him for the next two weeks.
Finally, I plucked up the courage to phone him and asked: ‘Can I have that massage now?’
We met up and he massaged me for two and a half hours, and I realised that no matter how anyone thought he looked, Colin was brilliant with his hands.
Our next meeting was a proper date and we couldn’t keep our hands off each other.
Four years later, we still can’t – and I feel so lucky to have found a bloke who makes me feel this way, every day.
A few of my model friends have taken me to one side and asked: ‘Why are you with him? What do you see in him?’
But I really don’t know what they’re talking about. In my eyes, he’s drop-dead gorgeous. He’s my perfect man.
My five-year-old son, James, absolutely loves him. I want to have children with Colin. I’m sure they’d be just as adorable as he is.
Besides, once the bedroom lights go out, it’s down to sexual skill and personality – and my Colin has tons of both.

‘He’s not old and ugly – he’s God’s gift’
Artist Inesa Vaiciute, 25, can’t get enough of Barrington, her wrinkly lover.
I was on a train when I spotted a man with long, straggly hair and a very unusual face.
Barrington’s looks intrigued me and we got talking. He told me he worked as an artist and I assumed he was in his late forties.
There was something about him. We chatted for the rest of the journey and I was increasingly drawn to him.
He was no George Clooney – he looked unkempt and had a huge hooked nose, but there was something about his eyes that drew me in.
We swapped email addresses and kept in touch. Months later, we went on our first date. We ended up going to a castle and staying there together for two weeks.
He told me he was actually 63 years old!
Yes, he’s 38 years older me, but he has so much energy, I have trouble keeping up. My nickname for him is ‘my baby’.
We do get strange looks in the street, but I couldn’t care less. I don’t see him as an old, ugly man – to me, he’s God’s gift.

Out now ... for more real life stories

Before him, I dated men my own age. But they felt threatened by my creativity and the attention I attracted.
Barrington doesn’t get jealous or insecure. In fact, he feels proud when I get chatted up. He’s the first guy I’ve felt totally comfortable with. We’re both artists and share the same passions.
Our sex life is fantastic. We make love every day. Barrington’s age is a plus there, too. He has years of experience in the sack.
When we’re out, I see women gawping at him. But I don’t think they’re staring because he’s ugly.
I reckon they’re checking him out. I bet they’d secretly love to run their fingers through his mane of hair. I know they’re jealous of my gorgeous boyfriend.
I think people today are too obsessed by perfect, model looks. But that’s just boring. Barrington’s long hair and unusual face make me weaker at the knees than any pretty boy soap star or model.
I feel privileged to be with Barrington. He’s the soulmate I’ve been searching for.
May 22nd, 2007  
Yeah baby!! Oh wait... I'm already married...
May 22nd, 2007  
Hey, there's still hope for me!!!!!

I'm stuck in a 1980s time warp. I have a nice bushy moustache and a hair like this...

Did I mention that I wear jeans, tucked in T-shirts, cowboy boots, large belt buckles, and baseball caps.

I'm 100% 1980s southerner.....
We only date ugly men

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