Trojan Condoms!

Freyja said:
Then its fortunate that this lady is armed with a C7A1 and a Sig Sauer P210. :m16:

As I have.

As a soldier you have to be prepared for all scenarios.
A black condom over the gun muzzle prevents water and mud from entering through the gun barrel while on exercise in the winter time.

Well yes, but the doctor said that it could be cured with penicillin.

I use a different technique
I always choose a sex partner who´s not as tall as me. Then he is forced to stand on an upturned bucket. Then I keep an eye on his eyes, and just before he becomes Cross-eyed - I kick the bucket!
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I can be your doctor and cure the itch without penicillin, do you want me to be your :firedevi: or your :angel: doctor?
 
Freyja said:
Then its fortunate that this lady is armed with a C7A1 and a Sig Sauer P210. :m16:
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I've always had a thing for wimens who are packing some serious s**t! :rock:

Freyja said:
A black condom over the gun muzzle prevents water and mud from entering through the gun barrel while on exercise in the winter time.
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Been there, done that! :p ;)

I was hoping you were planning an orgy for all of the boys on the forum! :crybaby:
 
Freyja said:
trojansk.jpg

Who named it Trojan Condoms?
The Trojan Horse entered through the city gates, broke open and loads of little guys came out and messed up everyones day.
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I see what you are doing here,

I am gathering my materials and leaving, I want no part in this master plan of yours!
 
Yossarian said:
Quite the contrary friend, remember, "When In doubt , Pull Out."
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Or when you are done, you can also practice a common thing, the one night stand. There are same basic rules you must consider if you do;

Never use your own place; you need your base camp to return to after a mission. There is a risk of not getting the target out from your own place as well.

Don't ever use your real name, you can be found, if a phone is involved in any way, don't use or give out your real phone number, the same for emails.

If you are residing in a smaller community, do it somewhere else and not close approximate to your base camp. In larger communities, you don't need to care, but you need to be vigilante.

Don't be too drunk when you are on a mission, you will regret it

And yes, I will burn in hell.....
 
I3BrigPvSk said:
Or when you are done, you can also practice a common thing, the one night stand. There are same basic rules you must consider if you do;

Never use your own place; you need your base camp to return to after a mission. There is a risk of not getting the target out from your own place as well.

Don't ever use your real name, you can be found, if a phone is involved in any way, don't use or give out your real phone number, the same for emails.

If you are residing in a smaller community, do it somewhere else and not close approximate to your base camp. In larger communities, you don't need to care, but you need to be vigilante.

Don't be too drunk when you are on a mission, you will regret it

And yes, I will burn in hell.....
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That's pretty much the advice I'd give! :D :rock:
 
Yossarian said:
Quite the contrary friend, remember, "When In doubt , Pull Out."
Click to expand...

Funny that you stated it...

Just last month, I was teaching a company of army recruits first aid, and we were on the topic of choking. It was late afternoon- maybe they were just tired, or it was just information overload..- I simply had a challeging time trying to get them to get the steps right- the procedure for clearing choking in a adult...

Finally I got to a point where I told them, "Look, there is a simple statement that I want you guys to remember. It goes like this...

Just tell your casualty- open your leg, bend over, I will thrust..."

Whatever it was that got them down cleared up. They immediately got it. Even the CSM that was with them were laughing away...

Army....;)
 
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I3BrigPvSk said:
Or when you are done, you can also practice a common thing, the one night stand. There are same basic rules you must consider if you do;

Never use your own place; you need your base camp to return to after a mission. There is a risk of not getting the target out from your own place as well.

Don't ever use your real name, you can be found, if a phone is involved in any way, don't use or give out your real phone number, the same for emails.

If you are residing in a smaller community, do it somewhere else and not close approximate to your base camp. In larger communities, you don't need to care, but you need to be vigilante.

Don't be too drunk when you are on a mission, you will regret it

And yes, I will burn in hell.....
Click to expand...


Operational parameters have been updated.

Use false qoutes from famous literature you have never read, (chances are she is too drunk to realize she has not read it either).

NEVER ask her anything directly, upon the start of "sexi tyme" operations, remember always speak about your wants in third person such as " would you perform B. if a guy did A. to you?"

ALWAYS remember, no means yes, yes means ****.

Do not speak of anything personal to you, remember you are an foreign operative behind enemy lines. Lie about your number of siblings, always say you went to high school out of state and speak garbled lines of a foreign language that she isn't familiar with.

( That will impress her friends for future "intelligence gathering" missions in the future).

Always remember, while in the field you are not who you normally are, chances are neither is she.

So keep that in mind if the crap she tells you seems a little to good to be true.

It isn't.

If you fear or detect signs that she is desperate or clingy , refer to figure 12. Bellow this section.

AprTriptoVa013a.jpg
 
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Freyja said:
I use a different technique
I always choose a sex partner who´s not as tall as me. Then he is forced to stand on an upturned bucket. Then I keep an eye on his eyes, and just before he becomes Cross-eyed - I kick the bucket!
Click to expand...

As a man well over 6ft tall I protest this particular course of action...of course I had to wait until after I stopped laughing to type this up.

Thanks for the laugh Freyja.:bravo:
 
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