I got your funny right here




 
--
Boots
 
April 8th, 2004  
Redneck
 
 

Topic: I got your funny right here


Ok, since no-one ever seems to like my jokes, I figured I'd put up another, just to be contrary . These are all inspirational quotes about one of the finer things in life .


You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding
on.
-Dean Martin

Friends don't let friends drink Light Beer.
- Anon.

Okay, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me. Let's just
take this exam so I can get back to killing you with beer.
- Homer J Simpson

Beauty lies in the hand of the Beer Holder.
- Anon.

The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk,
they're sober.
- William Butler Yeats

Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it.
- Anon.

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
- Oscar Wilde

A drink a day keeps the shrink away.
- Edward Abbey

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks
behind.
- Humphrey Bogart

If I saved all the money I've spent on beer, I'd spend it on
beer.
- Anon.

I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
- W.C. Fields

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
- Anon.

Beer is good food.
- Anon.

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
- Anon.

Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted
all of the time and have the time of your life.
- Anon.

Beer - it's not just a breakfast drink anymore.
- Anon.

Beer is the reason I get up every afternoon.
- Anon.

I will never drink again as long as i live... At least until
tonight.
- Colin

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
- Catherine Zandonella

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline
-it helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear
weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
- Frank Zappa
April 8th, 2004  
Redleg
 
 
April 8th, 2004  
Jamoni
 
Redneck, you forgot one, which I think you'll like:
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
--Benjamin Franklin
--
Boots
April 8th, 2004  
Redneck
 
 
Thanks, I did forget that one.
April 9th, 2004  
FutureRANGER
 
 
Along with those

"Never accept a drink from a urologist"
May 4th, 2004  
silent driller
 
 
MMMMMMMM...beeeeeeeeer...
-Homer Simpson
May 10th, 2004  
Bob Marley
 
edited by the moderator. This type of image does not belong here.