THE FEW, THE PROUD, THE MARINES




 
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Boots
 
January 5th, 2005  
ladyhawk
 

Topic: THE FEW, THE PROUD, THE MARINES


THE FEW, THE PROUD, THE MARINES
(A story of Creation):
In the beginning was the word, and the word was God. In the beginning was God, and all else was darkness and void, and without form. so God created the heavens and the Earth. He created the sun, and the moon, and the stars, so that light might pierce the darkness. The Earth, God divided between the land and the sea, and filled with many assorted creatures.

And the dark, salty, slimy creatures that inhabited the murky depths of the oceans, God called sailors. And he dressed them accordingly. They had little trousers that looked like bells at the bottom. And their shirts had cute little flaps on them to
hide the hickeys on their necks. He also gave them long sideburns and shabby looking beards. God nicknamed them "squids" and banished them to a lifetime at sea, so that normal folks would not have to associate with them. To further identify these unloved creatures, he called them "petty" and "commodore", instead of titles worthy of red-blooded men.

And the flaky creatures of the land, God called soldiers. And with a twinkle in his eye, and a sense of humor that only he could have, God made their trousers too short and their covers too large. He also made their pockets oversized, so that they might warm their hands. And to adorn their uniforms, God gave them badges in quantities that only a dime store owner could appreciate. And he gave them emblems and crests...and all sorts of shiny thing that glittered...and devices that dangled. (When you're God you tend to get carried away).

On the 6th day, he thought about creating some air creatures for which he designed a Greyhound bus driver's uniform, especially for Air Farce flyboys. But he discarded the idea during the first week, and it was not until years later that some apostles resurrected this theme and established what we now know as the "wild blue yonder wonders."

On the 7th day, as you know, God rested. But on the 8th day, at 0730, God looked down upon the Earth and was not happy. God was not happy! So he thought about his labors, and in his divine wisdom God created a divine creature. And he called this creature a Marine. And these Marines, whom God had created in his own image, were to be of the air, and of the land, and of the sea. And these he gave many wonderful uniforms. Some were green, some were blue with red trim. And in the early days, some were even a beautiful tan. He gave them practical fighting uniforms, so that they could wage war against the forces of Satan and evil. He gave them service uniforms for their daily work and training. And he gave them evening and dress uniforms...sharp and stylish, handsome things, so that they might promenade with their ladies on Saturday night and impress everybody! He even gave them swords, so that people who were not impressed, could be dealt with accordingly.

And at the end of the 8th day, God looked down upon the Earth and saw that it was good. But was God happy? NO! God was still not happy! Because in the course of his labors, he had forgotten one thing. He did not have a Marine uniform for himself. But he thought about it, and thought about it, and finally satisfied in knowing that, well...not everybody can be a MARINE.
January 5th, 2005  
implicature
 
 
WOW! that was border line...

but it still made me laugh... a new one to me!
January 5th, 2005  
Charge 7
 
 
I'd have spent more time in the forums before posting something like this that may give a chuckle to some but offends the many. And yes, I can laugh at myself with the best of them. This just isn't that funny.
--
Boots
January 6th, 2005  
AmericanSweetheart
 
 
Blasphemy comes to mind guys but I have to admit this one is pretty funny!
January 6th, 2005  
rotc boy
 
 
lmao
oo-rah!!
January 8th, 2005  
ladyhawk
 
I want to appolgize to anyone that I offended with this post.

I am truelly Sorry

LadyHawk out
January 8th, 2005  
Charge 7
 
 
Apology happily accepted
January 8th, 2005  
AFSteliga
 
 
It's pretty good.
January 9th, 2005  
AmericanSweetheart
 
 

Topic: Marine's rock


Oh I thought it was funny. oohrah!
January 9th, 2005  
DTop
 
 
I didn't think it was funny when I heard it 30 years ago and it hasn't aged very well Hoooah!

Just to prove that the old First Shirt actually does have a sense of humor I offer the following story:

Army vs. Marines!
Two Marines boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Dallas, headed for Houston.
One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat.
Just before take-off, an Army soldier got on and took the aisle seat next to the two Marines.
The Soldier kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Marine in the window seat said, "I think I'll get up and get a coke."
"No problem," said the Soldier, "I'll get it for you."
While he was gone, the Marine picked up the Soldier's shoe and spit in it. When the Soldier returned with the coke, the Marine in the middle seat said, "That looks good, I think I'll have one too."
Again, the Soldier obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the Marine picked up the soldier's other shoe and spit in it. The Soldier returned and they all sat back and enjoyed the rest of the short flight to Houston.
As the plane was landing, the Soldier slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.
"How long must this go on?" the Soldier asked.
"This fighting between our services? This hatred? This animosity?
This spitting in shoes and peeing in cokes?"