Chuck Norris

chuck norris CAN divide by zero.
Chuck Norris once took about 20 sleeping pills...they made him blink. once.
When Chuck Norris does push ups, he doesnt push himself up. He pushes the earth down.
 
Chuck Norris has nothing on Vin Diesel... VD once ate an entire cake at a bachelor party... before someone thought to tell him it contained a stripper.
 
Chuck Norris could have the world's most powerful nuke dropped directly on top of him and come out of the resulting blast completely unscathed... even if it means waltzing around in his "b-day suit".
 
Pop-a-squat said:
Chuck Norris could have the world's most powerful nuke dropped directly on top of him and come out of the resulting blast completely unscathed...
in worst case it would result in some dandruff... but thats definitive a "worst case scenario"
 
chuck norris sleeps with a nightlight, no because chuck is afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of chuck norris.


when chuck norris jumps in a pool, chuck norris doesn't get wet, the water gets chuck norris.



chuck norris doesn't wear a watch, he decides what time it is.
 
mcgyver can vuild an airplane out of gum a rubberband and a paperclip

chuck norris can kill him and take it


chuck norris inspects the inspector and tells him if he is up to code
 
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