West Texas Cowboy




 
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Boots
 
May 11th, 2006  
5.56X45mm
 
 

Topic: West Texas Cowboy


Subject: West Texas Cowboy

A West Texas cowboy was herding his herd in a remote pasture when
Suddenly a Brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a Young Man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
sunglasses and YSL tie, Leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If
I tell you exactly how many cows And Calves you have in your herd,will
you give me a calf?"

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
Peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
Connects it To his AT&T cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the
Internet, Where he Calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get
an exact fix on his Location Which he then feeds to another NASA
satellite that scans the area in An Ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
Exports it To an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.
Within seconds,He Receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image
has been processed And the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL
database through an ODBC Connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his
Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives A response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his
Hi-tech,miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the
Cowboy and says, "You have Exactly 1586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the
Cowboy. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks
On amused as The young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly
What Your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay,why
Not?"

"You're a consultant for the National Democratic Party." says the
Cowboy.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess That?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy.

"You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get
Paid for An answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You
tried to Show me How much smarter than me you are; and you don't know
a damn thing about cows........ Now give me back my dog."
May 11th, 2006  
tomtom22
 
 
Heard the Austrailian version a while back. Charge 7 also posted his version here: http://www.military-quotes.com/forum...ighlight=sheep
July 18th, 2006  
Rob Henderson
 
 
Hehehe. Thats good..haahaa
--
Boots
July 19th, 2006  
AFSteliga
 
 
Nice one.
July 21st, 2006  
Italian Guy
 
 
Good one.
August 5th, 2006  
AJChenMPH
 
 
Bump. So I sent this to a few of the contractors in my shop with the question: "So, is this representative of you guys?"

One response back: "Sure does. Except for the cattle thing. And Rob would have brokebacked the cowboy while Mitch chased after the heifers."
August 6th, 2006  
Sevens
 
 
LOL Funny!!
August 6th, 2006  
Team Infidel
 
 
Pretty funny.
August 29th, 2006  
AmericanSweetheart
 
 
funny funny!