weed
Active member
Katie Couric, Charlie Gibson, Brian Williams and a tough old US Army Sergeant were captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told them he'd grant each of them one last request before they were beheaded.
Katie Couric said, "Well, I'm a Southerner, so I'd like one last plate of fried chicken." The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chicken. Couric ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."
Charlie Gibson said, "I'm living in New York, so I'd like to hear the song "The Moon and New York City" one last time." The terrorist's leader nodded to another terrorist who had studied the Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played the song. Gibson sighed and declared he could now die peacefully.
Brian Williams said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe, someday, someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end."
The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Williams dictated his comments. He then said, "Now I can die happy."
The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. US Soldier, what is your final wish?"
"Kick me in the butt," said the Soldier.
"What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm NOT kidding. I want you to kick me in the butt," insisted the Soldier. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him in the butt.
The Soldier went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4 carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire. In a flash, all of them were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Soldier was untying Couric, Gibson and Williams, they asked him, "Why didn't you just shoot them all in the first place? Why did you ask him to kick you in the butt?"
"What!?!" replied the Soldier, "and have you three :cen:holes report that I was the aggressor?"
Katie Couric said, "Well, I'm a Southerner, so I'd like one last plate of fried chicken." The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chicken. Couric ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."
Charlie Gibson said, "I'm living in New York, so I'd like to hear the song "The Moon and New York City" one last time." The terrorist's leader nodded to another terrorist who had studied the Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played the song. Gibson sighed and declared he could now die peacefully.
Brian Williams said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe, someday, someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end."
The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Williams dictated his comments. He then said, "Now I can die happy."
The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. US Soldier, what is your final wish?"
"Kick me in the butt," said the Soldier.
"What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm NOT kidding. I want you to kick me in the butt," insisted the Soldier. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him in the butt.
The Soldier went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4 carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire. In a flash, all of them were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Soldier was untying Couric, Gibson and Williams, they asked him, "Why didn't you just shoot them all in the first place? Why did you ask him to kick you in the butt?"
"What!?!" replied the Soldier, "and have you three :cen:holes report that I was the aggressor?"
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