So I tried joining the army at 20 and didn't fully commit the idea until I was 21. When I was a week from shipping to boot camp as a 13Bravo (Field Artillery) I tore my ACL and had to get medically discharged for the time being. I didn't want to tell him but my mom's new boyfriend who was a Chief Warrant Officer 3rd Rank told me to be honest so I did. Well I kinda put the idea off thinking I was done and never could achieve it. So I got married moved around jobs and new have a new house and wife. With all that so far I recently striked the Idea of wanting to still join but as much as I want to commit full time I can't due to the wife and house. My wife doesn't want me to join saying its selfish but it's been my dream since I was a boy watching war movies with my dad. Wanting to fill that hole I've had in my life since then and still have. I wanted to fill it with the honor and respect of knowing I served my country and defended it against all who threaten it. I'm not some show boater but I just wanted it and still want to do it. But which strikes my problem now. Been 3 almost 4 years since ACL surgery and I wanted to try an go for Marine Reserves but don't know my chances of getting a medical waiver for it and them actually accepting me in. But anyways I'm Jon an I'm 24 will be 25 in Jan. Only 3 years left till I can enlist. If I can't get into Marine Reserves, Army will be my next trial if not rejected by MEPS, and if the Marines just reject me for my issue.

So any helpful information would be good and I know y'all can't give me true answers because MEPS is its own. MEPS makes its own decisions on what they believe. Just wondering if I'll even find a Recruiter really willing it press the issue to get me in.

Well, there is only one way to find out if a recruiter is going to push for you and that's to go and find a recruiter and see for yourself.

What's far more concerning for me is the problems I can see coming from your marriage. You and your wife need to have a real heartfelt sit down about what you want for each other and what you want out of the marriage. If, after you have a conversation about all that, she still isn't behind you on this decision then your marriage won't work...

If you join the military and your marriage is strong, then the military life will make it stronger...if it's weak, then military life will destroy it and destroy it quickly. This is not a simple decision. Some women just are not willing to share their man...and your wife needs to know and accept that if you join the military, then she will likely be 2nd place when it comes to your priorities. Some find it even harder to deal with their husbands being gone for months at a time and I've seen a few see it as a kind of betrayal and a way of justifying all sorts of bad behavior.

I'm not saying that this will happen to you but I will say that you really need to be concerned about the possible ramifications of you doing this without the full support from your wife. Remember, you are married and this decision should be the both of yours.

Lastly, war isn't like watching TV with your dad. It's good to want to serve but you need to do a lot more research before you take that step forward. War is a terrible thing where good people get blown to pieces. Better people than you or I get killed or maimed all the time because War is a b**ch. It's time to grow up and get the John Wayne images out of your head because that gets you killed.

Also think of the burden you place on your wife´s shoulder.

Not only must she live with the uncertainty that one day she may risks becoming a widow, but also that she needs to cope with all things back home herself, if and when you are posted.

The most important thing is that your wife must be clarified and fully accept your choice.
If you don´t have 100% support from your wife, then your thoughts may wander and that´s not optimal when deployed in a combat zone.


War Movies are entertainment, real war or combat can´t be retold, only experienced.

The Army will make strong things stronger. It will shatter weak things into a million pieces like glass dropped into a concrete floor. You must take this into account when thinking about this decision.

I have grown up from those war movies from when I'm a kid. This time trying to re-enlist I haven't been thinking about trying to a combat position like I did before when I was younger I've done a lot of research on this decision. I appreciate your concerns and advice. I plan on talking to my wife. Before we were married it took her awhile to be okay with it. Which she ended up being okay because at the time she was still in college and once she graduated and now graduated was/is going to be a teacher which is easy for her to find a job because teachers are needed any/everywhere. But ya now that were married makes it more of a decisions. She doesn't like me talking about it. But to me its still that empty hole I need to fill in.

I will be talking to her and I think it can benefit us. In more ways than one. And I do think about the possibilities it can leave her as a widow and to be by herself which hurts me as I think about stuff like that. She a very loyal woman unlike many of those you know and probably have seen for yourselves. She'd stick by me to the end just a matter of getting her on board with this idea. An possibly seeking the MOS to help my career or expand it into a different area than I have currently been working. But as all things come everything comes with a price.

To this I will have to get her support and will try if I get her acceptance of it. Which may be hard.

Thank you and grateful for your service. An it was John Wayne I grew up watching but my dad did heh. I missed the originals. Wars not a game its a horrible thing to see and be part of not something I plan on or wanting to do but if my country calls and needs for it. I'd like to be able to assist my future/possible brothers in arms.

Thanks brinktk and kesse81 and crazy tanker.

Forget all that shit if you have any doubts concerning a Military commitment then its not going to be a compete commitment , the Military is a calling , its not for everyone .

I don't know how you got me doubting about military commitment from what I've said but ok.

As an update I'm meeting with them Friday to gather info on the reserves. Had a talk with me wife. She got a little upset but then came to me later apologizing and told me to go talk to them. So I'm just going to get information. Then to bring my wife up there and let them talk to her to see what she thinks in the end ultimately. Good thing is I told them I couldn't ship as far as June of next year due to our anniversary and birthday for her. So it kinda worked out because their next reserve shipment would be June/July of 2015. They also seemed okay about my ACL so.. so far so good.

Originally Posted by tetvet

Forget all that shit if you have any doubts concerning a Military commitment then its not going to be a compete commitment , the Military is a calling , its not for everyone .

Really, what about all the guys that were given the choice to go to jail or go to the military? Is that a complete commitment? and how did they perform? Or draftees that stayed in after their initial commitment? Is their service worth less because it wasn't initially their "calling"?

Everyone has their own motivations for joining and as long as they do the job then I don't really give a crap as to why they joined.

As you might be able to tell by his terrible spelling, grammar, sentence structure, punctuation, and use of words...he might not be the brightest crayon in the box and has confirmed time and again that he is only able to use one color for every picture. Not really someone I'd take serious advice from.

Brick you becoming a boor , no you're past that , if you have a problem with me you have a number of choices and I'm open to most of them .

Reserves a good place to start see if the Military is for you , my Nephew is a Army Recruiter in TN , he said with the cutbacks in budget it is difficult to go active he said appx. 6-7 out of 10 applicants are turned away , obesity , IQ , jail records just about anything , Recruiters can pick and choose are instructed to be very choosey .