Things You Will Never Hear.......

January 18th, 2005  

Topic: Things You Will Never Hear.......

Things you wouldn't hear a Southerner say:

We don't keep firearms in this house.
Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?
You can't feed that to the dog.
I thought Graceland was tacky.
No kids in the back of the pick-up, it's not safe.
Wrasslin's fake.
Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
We're vegetarians.
Do you think my hair is too big?
I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.
Honey, these bonsai trees need watering?
Who is Richard Petty?
Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
Deer heads detract from the decor.
Spitting is such a nasty habit.
I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
Trim the fat off that steak.
Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
The tires on that truck are too big.
I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad.
I've got it all on a floppy disk.
Unsweetened tea tastes better.
Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
My fiancee, Paula Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
She's too old to be wearing that bikini.
Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?
Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
I don't have a favorite college team.
I believe you cooked those green beans too long.
Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.
Elvis who?
Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
January 19th, 2005  
that was DANG awesome... i think ever one of them are funny! and yes i can relate!!!
January 20th, 2005  
It's sad when you can sum up a way of life in a joke
February 17th, 2006  
Originally Posted by Darcia
It's sad when you can sum up a way of life in a joke
yeah but I wouldn't trade that way of life for anything!
February 17th, 2006  
Shoot! I made it by everything but the bonsai tree thing.
February 20th, 2006  

Why I had no idea!