Pacific Lure
Active member
A lawyer is standing at the gate to Heaven and St. Peter is listing his sins:
1) Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit where he knew they were guilty.
2) Defending an obviously guilty murderer because the fee was high.
3) Overcharging fees to many clients.
4) Prosecuting an innocent woman because a scapegoat was needed in a controversial case. And the list goes on for quite awhile.
The lawyer objects and begins to argue his case. He admits all these things, but argues, "Wait, I've done some charity in my life also."
St. Peter looks in his book and says,"Yes, I see. Once you gave a penny to a panhandler, and once you tipped the shoeshine boy with a penny, correct?"
The lawyer gets a smug look on his face and replies, "Yes."
St. Peter turns to the angel next to him and says,
"Give this guy his 2 cents back and tell him to go to hell."
A little old lady goes into a biker bar and demands to speak with the leader.
The leader of the gang stands up and asks, "what do ya need granny?"
"I want to join your gang", she says.
"Do you even own a leather jacket?" He asks.
"Sure do! It's outside on my hog!" She replies.
"Got any tattooes?" asked the bike leader.
"Sure do" says the old woman as she bares her arm to show him.
"Hmmm, well have you ever been picked up by the fuzz before?" He asks.
Granny replied, "Nope, but I have been swung by my titties a few times!"
1) Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit where he knew they were guilty.
2) Defending an obviously guilty murderer because the fee was high.
3) Overcharging fees to many clients.
4) Prosecuting an innocent woman because a scapegoat was needed in a controversial case. And the list goes on for quite awhile.
The lawyer objects and begins to argue his case. He admits all these things, but argues, "Wait, I've done some charity in my life also."
St. Peter looks in his book and says,"Yes, I see. Once you gave a penny to a panhandler, and once you tipped the shoeshine boy with a penny, correct?"
The lawyer gets a smug look on his face and replies, "Yes."
St. Peter turns to the angel next to him and says,
"Give this guy his 2 cents back and tell him to go to hell."
A little old lady goes into a biker bar and demands to speak with the leader.
The leader of the gang stands up and asks, "what do ya need granny?"
"I want to join your gang", she says.
"Do you even own a leather jacket?" He asks.
"Sure do! It's outside on my hog!" She replies.
"Got any tattooes?" asked the bike leader.
"Sure do" says the old woman as she bares her arm to show him.
"Hmmm, well have you ever been picked up by the fuzz before?" He asks.
Granny replied, "Nope, but I have been swung by my titties a few times!"
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