Saddam Vs Paddy




 
--
Boots
 
November 23rd, 2004  
pattheoneuk
 
 

Topic: Saddam Vs Paddy


Saddam Hussein was sitting down wondering who to bomb next, when his phone rang. "Hello," the voice said. "This is Paddy at the Harp Pub in Ireland, I am ringing you to say me and a couple of me mates are declaring war on you!" "Well Paddy," replied Saddam, "how big is your army"

"Well lets see there's me, my brother sean, my next door neighbour seamus and the local dart team." "Ahh" said Saddam. "I must tell you that you are against 1 million men, 16000 tanks and 14000 armoured personnel carriers." Paddy then hung up....The next day, sure enough, Paddy rung again, "The war is still on Mr. Hussein." Paddy said. "We now have some infantry and equipment."

"What would that be" Saddam asked. "Well we have 2 combines, a bulldozer, and Father Murpheys Grey Fergy tractor," Paddy replied. Saddam sighed "Paddy may I tell you that my army has increased to 2 million men since we last spoke." "I'll get back to ya," Paddy said. Sure enough Paddy rang again, "Right Mr. Hussein, we've modified our two seater Harrigans ultra light plane with a gattling gun, and four boys from the Shamrock Pub have joined us."

Saddam cleared his throat lay back on his chair and said, "Paddy... I have 10000 bombers, 20000 fighter planes, and I am surrounded by surface to air lazer guided missles, and my army has incresed to 2 and a half million men since yesterday." "Oh" said Paddy, "I'll have to ring ya back" Paddy called again the next day and said "I'm sorry, but the wars been called off." "I'm sorry to hear that, why the sudden change of heart?" asked Saddam. "Well after a discussion over a couple of pints we decided there's no way we could feed two and a half million prisoners"

November 23rd, 2004  
dougal
 
 
ya thats very good. Havent heard it in ages. Its even better at 2am when your pissed

You forgot to mention he was from Cavan
November 23rd, 2004  
pattheoneuk
 
 
i just passed it on as i received it.... had me in stitches
--
Boots
November 23rd, 2004  
Darcia
 
Thats pretty good.
November 25th, 2004  
rotc boy
 
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dameon
Thats pretty good.
pretty good? its great!!!
November 26th, 2004  
AFSteliga
 
 
Nice stuff you got there
December 3rd, 2004  
Italian Guy
 
 
Nice one
December 3rd, 2004  
dougal
 
 
Its better when you hear it from a drunk Irish Cavan man!!
December 3rd, 2004  
beardo
 
What do you do if you come across an Irishman?






















Wipe it off and say your'e sorry
December 3rd, 2004  
dougal
 
 
A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers. He went though the standard training, completed the practice jumps from higher and higher structures, and finally went to take his first jump from an airplane. The next day, he called home to his father to tell him the news. "So, did you jump?" the father asked. "Well, let me tell you what happened. We got up in the plane, and the sergeant opened up the door and asked for volunteers. About a dozen men got up and just walked out of the plane!" "Is that when you jumped?" asked the father. "Um, not yet. Then the sergeant started to grab the other men one at a time and throw them out the door." "Did you jump then?" asked the father. "I'm getting to that. Every one else had jumped, and I was the last man left on the plane. I told the sergeant that I was too scared to jump. He told me to get off the plane or he'd kick my ass." "So, did you jump?" "Not then. He tried to push me out of the plane, but I grabbed onto the door and refused to go. Finally he called over to the Jump Master. The Jump Master is this great big guy, about six-foot five, and 250 pounds. He said to me, "Boy, are you gonna jump or not?'' I said, "No, sir. I'm too scared. So the Jump Master pulled down his zipper and took his ***** out. I swear, it was about ten inches long and as big around as a baseball bat! He said, 'Boy, either you jump out that door, or I'm sticking this little baby up your ass.'" "So, did you jump?" asked the father. "Well, a little, at first.