Relationship Advice

wow....im sorry to hear that your going through this tough time....ive been where you are with the heartache...many times in fact...i find that in the case where you do find that its definitely over with someone that you have spent so much invested time with you just have to give it time...after a while the heartache lessens....you learn that you are worth a great relationship with a great guy...you are able to move on when it doesnt hurt so much..you just got to take it a day at a time....and when you least expect it you meet that person that makes you forget about all the bad apples that youve encountered....
 
he's just being difficult to make you closer to him. He actually doesn't think you're being close enough. so he's sending you mixed messages like he's not getting anything out of it to make you closer to him. it's a power thing.

THE VERDICT: drop him like a sack of potatoes.
 
I feel like this thread should belong to Registered Members unless Philam15 don't care if it's public.
 
I've seen guys do this a million times.
They pretend like they don't care so the girl works harder to get close to him. It's like how to make little kids love violin. You play it in front of them, you let them see it, you talk about it, but never let them touch it. Until the right moment.
He's playing you.
Get rid of him. And if he doesn't feel anything, don't be surprised.
Also, it's hard to find boys in your age range who want peace, relaxation etc. Boys your age are about war and immaturity. It's practically unavoidable.

True love generally comes later.
I knew a couple from high school. They looked really good together and did everything together the whole time ... maybe a four or five year relationship. They got married when they were no more than 19 and they broke up pretty quickly after that.
I think it often happens because these people have to take a turn in their lives to go to school and eventually build careers. They don't want to sacrifice too much and they end up going their own ways regardless of how they feel about one another. Which I think is stupid.
People will find you happiness. Your job... not much so. At work you will be under the command of people who don't give two squirts a piss about you. But people realize this too late and later find themselves starved of meaningful relationships and in a work environment that they hate.
Anyways, what I mean is, true love can find you at any point but once you got it, it better be your first priority. And as for immature boys... I think you're just going to have to let time sort this one out... and make sure you pick the ones that actually grow up. No, it's not necessarily the one with the fat pay cheque, the fast car and a stellar job at a bank. If anything usually these guys grow up the slowest.
Ummm... that's all I got for now I guess.
 
Entirely too much drama... youth is wasted on the young.

As my wife recently reminded me, the female of the species tends to run their mouth so that others may commiserate with them. Whereas males talk about problems in order to find a solution. So consider me with a blank stare and nodding my head at appropriate intervals to simulate interest and continue...
 
infuse her with some wisdom.
But I think you're right.
Except my wife always seems to be solution oriented. Thought nodding my head up and down would do it. But I found myself getting kicked out the door with a broom stick in my hand.
 
I think it really makes me feel good when people tell me that all the girls in forensics like him too! peachy keen..well I dont play that way, even though he thinks I do...

anyways heres the latest drama:
He had said that I told one of my friends to "spy on him"

I texted her about it...I sent him the texts to prove I wasn't lying


Lindsey Maggard
4:45pm October 23rd

Maschler Megan: And the whole " i told ryan that u wanted me 2 spy on him " ya i told him that 2 get him 2 shut up. Sry

Me: wait u told him that today?

Me: to get him to shut up?

Maschler Megan: Told him what?

Me: the whole spying thing...u told him that today to get him to shut up?

Maschler Megan: Kinda. Well, ya. But not 2day. Yesterday.

Maschler Megan: Yes! But not 2day. I told him yesterday. I know it doesn't make much since. But it sorta did @ the time.

Me: Hmmm...did u tell him today that I didn't say that?

Maschler Megan: We didn't talk about that 2day b/c i told him that i'm no longer in the middle of u 2

Me: ok...well i'll just send him a facebook message of our texts so that he knows that I'm not lying...is that ok with u?

Maschler Megan: Yes

Me: ok i'll text u later

Maschler Megan: Thx

Me: yup I'm here to serve

Maschler Megan: R u really telling the truth about not making out w/ john though

Me: yes...u know how...

Megan: Ya i c ur point

Me: I wouldn't hurt ryan...i wouldn't hurt andrea I turned him down...

Maschler Megan: That's cool

Me: lol yeah...i guess if you like...

Maschler Megan: Ryan seems like a nice guy but i don't know him. I know u though. That's y i'm believing u. Put that on facebook

Me: Ok thank you megan... :-D

I don't feel the need to have to explain myself more than this...I've never lied to you never willIf you doubt thats what me and megan texted I'll give you my ****ing phone so you can see for yourself, or maybe megan will let you see hers

Im done fighting, because this is just taking too much of a toll on me, it's making me physically sick

but you know theres one thing that still makes me curious

that day, the day when you lost an eyelash and you made a wish, and you wouldnt tell me?

I wonder if what you wished came true and if it made you happy.

I hope it made you happy

Ryan Garner
6:26pm October 23rd

the wish did not come true because my dreams never come true

Lindsey Maggard
6:28pm October 23rd

so what did you wish for?

Ryan Garner
6:29pm October 23rd

for us to be together foreverbut as usual my wildest dreams have always been temporary

Lindsey Maggard
6:31pm October 23rd

I'm sorry
I didn't mean to cause all this drama
I didn't mean to bring you pain
I didn't mean to go crazy
my intentions were good...but I guess my actions wernt

Ryan Garner
6:33pm October 23rd

idk theres just wayy too much drama for me to handle.....i carry other peoples problems on my shoulder as is...i dont need more of it......i just really really need my space

Lindsey Maggard
6:34pm October 23rd
gotcha
Click to expand...

yup basically...its over so my only thoughts now are

does he still like me?

and...how long should I wait before I get into a new relationship...enough time so that it probably wouldn't hurt ryan?

what do you guys think?
 
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Remember, only a fool thinks that males and females are not different in every way. "Love" is what a relationship evolves into if both people are compatible to some degree. Young males have a strong need for male bonding and perceive the attention needed from him by a young female as an attempt to cling and force him into a change of habits that has developed in our species over eons.

There comes a time, or age, when the need to bond with the opposite sex is stronger than his male companionships. Not everyone reaches this stage at the same age, usually between 19 and 25 years of age for men. Until that time, lust and variety in partners is pretty much what men dwell on.

When a relationship becomes so intimate that "love" is an overwhelming feeling, not a word, then chances are good for a successful long term commitment. Fidelity by both will be one of the most important parts of a long term relationship. Trust builds over years, not months, and is the glue that bonds two into one.
 
Missileer said:
Remember, only a fool thinks that males and females are not different in every way. "Love" is what a relationship evolves into if both people are compatible to some degree. Young males have a strong need for male bonding and perceive the attention needed from him by a young female as an attempt to cling and force him into a change of habits that has developed in our species over eons.

There comes a time, or age, when the need to bond with the opposite sex is stronger than his male companionships. Not everyone reaches this stage at the same age, usually between 19 and 25 years of age for men. Until that time, lust and variety in partners is pretty much what men dwell on.

When a relationship becomes so intimate that "love" is an overwhelming feeling, not a word, then chances are good for a successful long term commitment. Fidelity by both will be one of the most important parts of a long term relationship. Trust builds over years, not months, and is the glue that bonds two into one.
Click to expand...
Peace be unto you...
and also with you
Go forth and multiply...
hooooooooooooweeee!
 
Thanks you guys for all the advice!so basically I have a lot of guy friends...and I know how they talk about girls! let me tell you they have a lot of momentary fancies its crazy. and they don't even care that they hurt the poor girl! what jerks.so basically dating is stupid because the bad outweighs the good.too bad I can't become a nun at 16
 
philam15 said:
Thanks you guys for all the advice!so basically I have a lot of guy friends...and I know how they talk about girls! let me tell you they have a lot of momentary fancies its crazy. and they don't even care that they hurt the poor girl! what jerks.so basically dating is stupid because the bad outweighs the good.too bad I can't become a nun at 16
Click to expand...

Just concentrate on becoming a good little person. That's all I ever asked of my kids and grandkids. I didn't care if they did or didn't become doctors or lawyers, just good people. If you want to become a cloistered Nun, wait until thirty years of age, then become one only at the calling of God, not because of a failure of an attempt to become someone's "ho."
 
Don't feel bad hon.. Men are weird. I had just about the same thing happen to me with a guy I really liked. Let go. *Sighs sadly* It's not you.
 
i 'd quote stewie from Family Guy:

Stewie Griffin: Women, Brian, what a royal pain in the ass. It's like, it's like why can't you just hang out with guys, you know, just live with someone of your own sex, just do what you do with women, but with your buddy. You know wha, why don't guys just do that?
Brian Griffin: They do. It's called being gay.
Stewie Griffin: Oh, is that what gay is? Oh, yeah. I could totally get into that.
 
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