pet diaries




 
--
Boots
 
November 6th, 2004  
rotc boy
 
 

Topic: pet diaries


Dog's diary:

8am -- Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9am -- Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite
10am - Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
11am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
Noon - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
1pm -- Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
3pm -- Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
4pm -- Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5pm -- Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!
7pm -- Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9pm -- Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!


Cat's diary:

Day 183 of my captivity...

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded -- must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair -- must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. This did not work according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn more about what this is, and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies, or more likely snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit.

The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, for now his safety is assured. But I can wait; it is only a matter of time...Time is my friend, I can wait, I will repay them all.
November 6th, 2004  
C/2nd Lt Robot
 
 
u forgot about the bath
2pm Bath, oooh bummer
November 8th, 2004  
Patriot_1989tobeyond
 
Liked the cats life.
--
Boots
November 8th, 2004  
USAOwnz
 
The cat reminds me of Stewie from family guy.
February 26th, 2007  
Team Infidel
 
 
hahaha that's why i don't have any cats