Not military but Canadian- and fun.




 
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Boots
 
October 4th, 2004  
Italian Guy
 
 

Topic: Not military but Canadian- and fun.


Ant and a grasshopper

THE ORIGINAL VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

MODERN CANADIAN VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come the winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

The CBC shows up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. Canadians are stunned by the sharp contrast. How can it be that, in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Then a representative of the NAGB (The national association of green bugs) shows up on The National and charges the ant with green bias, and makes the case that the grasshopper is the victim of 30 million years of greenism. Kermit the Frog appears on the Nature of Things with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when he sings "It's not easy being green.

"Jean Chretien makes a special guest appearance on the CBC Evening News to tell a concerned public that they will do everything they can for the grasshopper who has been denied the prosperity he deserves by those who benefited unfairly during the Reagan/Thatcher summers. Sheila Copps exclaims in an interview with Peter Mansbridge that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."

Finally, the Liberals draft the "Economic Equity and Anti-Greenism Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government. John Turner gets his law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal hearing officers that Chretien appointed from a list of single-parent welfare moms who can only hear cases on Thursday's between 1:30 and 3 PM.

The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he's in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him since he doesn't know how to maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

And on the TV, which the grasshopper bought by selling most of the ant's food, they are showing Jean Chretien standing before a wildly applauding group of liberals announcing that a new era of "fairness" has dawned in Canada.
October 4th, 2004  
A Can of Man
 
 
lol how true.
October 5th, 2004  
AFSteliga
 
 
Nice.
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Boots
October 5th, 2004  
Darcia
 
Thats pretty good..
October 5th, 2004  
Italian Guy
 
 
glad you guys liked that.
October 7th, 2004  
Darkmb101
 
always blame everything on the media
October 8th, 2004  
coldzero
 
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Darkmb101
always blame everything on the media
yup
October 8th, 2004  
A Can of Man
 
 
Of course it is a very competitive, and ruthless business.
They don't care if their story leads to people dying or having a good man get crucified or have someone risking his life for his country actually pay his price. They just want to sell the story before their competitors do.
Often they like to play on emotion etc. In this case, the sympathy for the weak.
January 17th, 2007  
Sevens
 
 
Nice....
April 18th, 2007  
Team Infidel
 
 
that is pretty good