More military laws

SigPig

Active member
The Automatic Fire Principle
It’s not the bullet with your name on it you should worry about; it’s the ones marked “To Whom It May Concern”.

Bruff’s Definition:
“Gun Control” means being able to track to your second target.

Calvin and Hobbes’ Doctrine on Training Exercises:
Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something totally pointless.

Reserve Training Formulae:
  • If it ain’t rainin’...it ain’t trainin’.
    If it ain’t snowin’...we ain’t goin’!

Supply Tech’s Postulate:
If the shoe fits, you’re lucky.

Sup Tech’s Response to Stores Requests, or The Five Empty Boxes of Supply:
  • 1. We ain’t got it.
    2. It ain’t on your scale of issue.
    3. If I give you one, I’ll have to give one to everybody else.
    4. If I give you one, there’ll be none left on the shelf.
    5. You gotta bring back the old one before we give you a new one.

Bailey’s Declaration:
A tasking not worth doing is not worth doing well.

MacArthur’s Definition:
Victory means never having to say you’re sorry.

The Three Standing Orders for Recruits, GDs and PATs:
  • If it moves, salute it.
    If it doesn’t move, carry it.
    If you can’t carry it, paint it.

Sapper’s 5-Step Rule for Precision Construction:
  • 1. Measure with micrometer.
    2. Mark with chalk.
    3. Cut with axe.
    4. If it doesn’t fit, get a bigger hammer.
    5. Pound to fit, paint to match.

The 6 Stages of an Exercise:
  • 1. Anticipation
    2. Disillusionment
    3. Panic
    4. Search for the guilty
    5. Punishment of the innocent
    6. Praise and credit for the undeserving

The FIBIJAR Principle:
F:cen: It, Buddy, I’m Just A Reservist.

The Five Most Frightening Things Ever Heard In The Army
  • 1. A Private saying, “I learned this in Cadets...”
    2. A Sergeant saying, “Trust me, Sir…”
    3. A Second Lieutenant saying, “Based on my experience...”
    4. A Captain saying, “I was just thinking...”
    5. And a Warrant Officer chuckling, “Watch this $%!#...”

RMS Clerk Terms of Reference
  • -If it rings, put it on hold.
    -If it clanks, call a tech.
    -If it whistles, ignore it.
    -If it’s a friend, go for a smoke.
    -If it’s the CO, look busy.
    -If it talks, take notes.
    -If it’s handwritten, type it.
    -If it’s typed, copy it.
    -If it’s copied, file it.
    -If it’s Friday, FORGET IT!
 
RMS Clerk Terms of Reference

-If it rings, put it on hold.
-If it clanks, call a tech.
-If it whistles, ignore it.
-If it’s a friend, go for a smoke.
-If it’s the CO, look busy.
-If it talks, take notes.
-If it’s handwritten, type it.
-If it’s typed, copy it.
-If it’s copied, file it.
-If it’s Friday, FORGET IT!
Sounds like my ROTC unit.
 
Desert_Eagle said:
RMS Clerk Terms of Reference

-If it rings, put it on hold.
-If it clanks, call a tech.
-If it whistles, ignore it.
-If it’s a friend, go for a smoke.
-If it’s the CO, look busy.
-If it talks, take notes.
-If it’s handwritten, type it.
-If it’s typed, copy it.
-If it’s copied, file it.
-If it’s Friday, FORGET IT!
Sounds like my ROTC unit.

maybe that is why i havent joined...?


funny though...nice one sigpig
 
danthepirate said:
Desert_Eagle said:
RMS Clerk Terms of Reference

-If it rings, put it on hold.
-If it clanks, call a tech.
-If it whistles, ignore it.
-If it’s a friend, go for a smoke.
-If it’s the CO, look busy.
-If it talks, take notes.
-If it’s handwritten, type it.
-If it’s typed, copy it.
-If it’s copied, file it.
-If it’s Friday, FORGET IT!
Sounds like my ROTC unit.

maybe that is why i havent joined...?


funny though...nice one sigpig

Making fun of us eh Pope?
 
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