Marine letter home

Navy Boy

I LOVE THE ARMY!!!!!!
Dear Ma and Pa:

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine
Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick
before maybe all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m.,
but am getting so I like to sleep late.

Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine
some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split,
fire to lay. Practically nothing. Men get to shave but it is not so bad,
there be warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon,
etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie
and other regular food. But tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the
two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon
when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.

We go on "route" marches, which the Platoon Sergeant says are long walks to
harden us. If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him different. A
"route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys
get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks. The country is nice, but awful
flat.

The Sergeant is like a schoolteacher. He nags some. The Captain is like the
school board. Majors and Colonels just ride around and frown. They don't
bother you none. This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing.

I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near
as big as a chipmunk head and don't move. And it ain't shooting at you, like
the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and
hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle
with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy.
It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they
got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Holler. He
joined up the same time as me. But I'm only 5' 6" and 130 pounds,
(soakin' wet and bladder full) and he's 6' 8",
and weighs near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get
onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter, Gail (Semper Fi )
 
ya it has, it was like, redneck letter home or something, but its been posted, there was also an Aussie version...
 
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