The Male Point System




 
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The Male Point System
 
June 11th, 2007  
Pacific Lure
 
 

Topic: The Male Point System


The Male Point System
In the world of romance, one single rule applies:
Make the woman happy.
Do something she likes, and you get points.
Do something she dislikes, and points are subtracted.
You don't get any points for doing something she expects...Sorry, that's the way the game is played.

Here's a guide to the point system.

Simple Duties:

You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows (0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets(-1)
You leave the toilet seat up (-5)
You replace the toilet-paper roll when it's empty (0)
When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex (-1)
When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom (-2)
You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light panty liners with wings (+5)
But return with beer (-5)
You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it's nothing (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it's something (+5)
You pummel it with a six iron (+10)
It's her father (-20)

Social Engagements

You stay by her side the entire party (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy (-2)
Named Tiffany (-4)
Tiffany is a dancer (-6)
Tiffany has implants (-8)

Her Birthday

You take her out to dinner (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)
Okay, it is a sports bar (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team (-10)

A Night Out with The Boys

Go out with a pal (-5)
And the pal is happily married (-4)
Or frighteningly single (-7)
And he drives a Lotus (-10)
With a personalized license plate "GR8 N BED" (-15)

A Night Out

You take her to a movie (+2)
You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
You take her to a movie you like (-2)
It's called DeathCop3 (-3)
Which features cyborgs having sex (-9)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

Your Physique

You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
You say "I don't give a damn because you have one too" (-800)

The Big Question

She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5)
You hesitate in responding (-10)
You reply, "Where?" (-35)

Communication

When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, for over 30 minutes (+5)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+10)
She realizes this is because you've fallen asleep (-20)
June 12th, 2007  
AmericanSweetheart
 
 
My husband is down about -150
June 12th, 2007  
Team Infidel
 
 
ah.. i don't want to evendo this one
--
The Male Point System
June 12th, 2007  
Pacific Lure
 
 
ah.. i don't want to evendo this one
__________________

Aw, c'mon Sugar Pie, you know I'm just jokin now!!
June 12th, 2007  
AmericanSweetheart
 
 
So am I! I do things wrong and lose points with him.. At the end of the day no one is counting!
June 12th, 2007  
Rob Henderson
 
 
but wait... you forgot... "never getting married in the first place so one never has to deal with these things... + infinity."
June 13th, 2007  
AmericanSweetheart
 
 
lol!!!!!!!!
June 13th, 2007  
CrazyLilCajun
 
 
oh funny!!!
June 14th, 2007  
senojekips
 
 
My calculator has only got seven figures in minus mode. It was just flashing on all segments, so I fixed it...... "In the bin"

Damned Chinese calculators!
June 14th, 2007  
Missileer
 
 
Well, if you play your cards right, you can go to bed with a negative off the chart and wake up with a positive off the chart.
 


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