senojekips
Active member
The following incident happened sometime in late 1965 when I was a young Stoker aboard "HMAS Sydney" as I remember.
Every night when rounds (Inspection) were conducted, the rounds entourage seemed to be getting larger and larger, with more and more 'hangers on" there was a bugler, the OOD, a couple of members of the regulating (ships police) staff one member of the ship's army staff and God only knows who else. About this time it was decided by somebody further up the food chain that it would be good experience for the young Ceylonese (Sri Lankan) Midshipmen (Officer cadets) to join the happy throng. The two young blokes in question were typical of their type and were always dressed impeccably and took their duties very seriously. They took it upon themselves to look in all the nooks and crannies, eagerly wiping their fingers over every surface trying to find something that they could take the messdeck cleaner to task about. Certain persons in 4 Golf Stoker's (We were a somewhat rebellious lot at the best of times) mess were somewhat less than impressed with this and it was decided it was time to take these two down a peg or two.
One of mess members had in his posession, a large black rubber spider about 4" in diameter and it was decided that it would be suspended by a piece of stout cotton, up over one of the many lines criss crossing the deckhead immediately inside of the doorway between 4Golf and 4Hotel passageway. The cotton was then run across the deckhead through the maze of pipes and ventilation ducts to the furthermost corner of the mess where the perpetrator of this horrible deed would take charge of the end. Immediately preceding rounds several test runs were duly completed and we sat back to observe the effect with several persons being placed so the operator could not be clearly seen by the inspection party.
In due time the bugle is heard and everyone moves to their stations. Through he door they come, in single file with the two middies bringing up the rear. As the first of the Middies steps into the mess and the second is just traversing the shin cracker, (a 12 inch high watertight hatch coaming) our friend quickly drops the spider directly into the first middies line of sight. For a fraction of a second he peers anxiously ahead, keen to get about his business, when suddenly it dawns on him what it is about a foot in front of his nose. YAAAGGHHHH, WOT DAT!!! all pretence and posh voice is momentarily forgotten, and he springs backwards away from the horrible apparition in front, pushing his mate backwards over the step and the pair of them land on their backs on the deck in 4H passageway.
All eyes in the rounds party swing back to see the cause of the commotion, but by this time the spider has been hurriedly jerked up out of the way into the dim recesses of the pipework and all that remains to be seen is the two hapless Middies floundering about on the red hot deck of 4H passageway (it was immediately above No 1 Boiler Room).
Well,... from there it just turned into a real circus with all of the occupants of 4G rolling about with laughter. The first Middie tried to explain, but the OOD who by now new that the rounds party were the butt of some terrible joke as yet unknown to him, just wanted to be out of it all and get back to the security of the wardroom. So as soon as the Middies had picked themselves up and dusted off their not quite so immaculate whites, they quickly left much to the disgust of the regulating staff present.
For the next week there were always fits of suppressed snickering as the rounds party came into the mess, with the OOD and all following looking nervously around waiting for something to happen. The poor blo*dy Middies always appeared to be quite pleased to get into the Galley flat without any further disasters.
Ahhh.... for the good old days.
Every night when rounds (Inspection) were conducted, the rounds entourage seemed to be getting larger and larger, with more and more 'hangers on" there was a bugler, the OOD, a couple of members of the regulating (ships police) staff one member of the ship's army staff and God only knows who else. About this time it was decided by somebody further up the food chain that it would be good experience for the young Ceylonese (Sri Lankan) Midshipmen (Officer cadets) to join the happy throng. The two young blokes in question were typical of their type and were always dressed impeccably and took their duties very seriously. They took it upon themselves to look in all the nooks and crannies, eagerly wiping their fingers over every surface trying to find something that they could take the messdeck cleaner to task about. Certain persons in 4 Golf Stoker's (We were a somewhat rebellious lot at the best of times) mess were somewhat less than impressed with this and it was decided it was time to take these two down a peg or two.
One of mess members had in his posession, a large black rubber spider about 4" in diameter and it was decided that it would be suspended by a piece of stout cotton, up over one of the many lines criss crossing the deckhead immediately inside of the doorway between 4Golf and 4Hotel passageway. The cotton was then run across the deckhead through the maze of pipes and ventilation ducts to the furthermost corner of the mess where the perpetrator of this horrible deed would take charge of the end. Immediately preceding rounds several test runs were duly completed and we sat back to observe the effect with several persons being placed so the operator could not be clearly seen by the inspection party.
In due time the bugle is heard and everyone moves to their stations. Through he door they come, in single file with the two middies bringing up the rear. As the first of the Middies steps into the mess and the second is just traversing the shin cracker, (a 12 inch high watertight hatch coaming) our friend quickly drops the spider directly into the first middies line of sight. For a fraction of a second he peers anxiously ahead, keen to get about his business, when suddenly it dawns on him what it is about a foot in front of his nose. YAAAGGHHHH, WOT DAT!!! all pretence and posh voice is momentarily forgotten, and he springs backwards away from the horrible apparition in front, pushing his mate backwards over the step and the pair of them land on their backs on the deck in 4H passageway.
All eyes in the rounds party swing back to see the cause of the commotion, but by this time the spider has been hurriedly jerked up out of the way into the dim recesses of the pipework and all that remains to be seen is the two hapless Middies floundering about on the red hot deck of 4H passageway (it was immediately above No 1 Boiler Room).
Well,... from there it just turned into a real circus with all of the occupants of 4G rolling about with laughter. The first Middie tried to explain, but the OOD who by now new that the rounds party were the butt of some terrible joke as yet unknown to him, just wanted to be out of it all and get back to the security of the wardroom. So as soon as the Middies had picked themselves up and dusted off their not quite so immaculate whites, they quickly left much to the disgust of the regulating staff present.
For the next week there were always fits of suppressed snickering as the rounds party came into the mess, with the OOD and all following looking nervously around waiting for something to happen. The poor blo*dy Middies always appeared to be quite pleased to get into the Galley flat without any further disasters.
Ahhh.... for the good old days.
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