You Know You're a True Texan When........




 
--
Boots
 
January 12th, 2005  
Missileer
 
 

Topic: You Know You're a True Texan When........


Subject: You know You're From Texas When...
Even if you aren't "from" Texas you've lived here long enough to enjoy the jokes:

You know you're from Texas if:

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.

2. "Vacation" means going to the family reunion.

3. You've seen all the big bands ten years after they were popular.

4. You measure distance in minutes.

5. You know several people who have hit a deer.

6. Your school classes were canceled because of cold.

7. Your school classes were canceled because of heat.

8. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

9. You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."

10. Stores don't have bags; they have sacks.

11. Stores don't have shopping carts; they have buggies.

12. You see people wearing boots and jeans at funerals.

13. You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it, no matter what time of the year.

14. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I am fixing to go to the store.

15. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, or animal.

16. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

17. You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.

18. You carry jumper cables in your car ... for your OWN car.

19. You know what "cow tipping" and "snipe hunting" is.

20. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.

21. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.

22. You think sexy lingerie is a tee shirt and boxer shorts.

23. The local papers covers national and international news on one page but requires 6 pages for sports.

24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

25. You know which leaf makes good toilet paper.

26. You find 90 degrees F "a little warm."

27. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer, and Christmas.

28. You know whether another Texan is from southern, middle, or northern Texas as soon as they open their mouth.

29. There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 or more.

30. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past-time known as "gin' Awl-Martin" or off to "Wally World."

31. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.

32. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop ... it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor.

33. You recognize that beans and cornbread is a meal that must have been bestowed upon the people by the Lord Himself.

34. You can be satisfied with a meal consisting only of a hunk of bread with flavored flour and milk (a delicacy known as "biscuits n' gravy").

35. You understand these jokes and forward them to your friends from Texas.

Ain't that the truth!
January 12th, 2005  
CavScout
 
Don't forget fried green tomatoes...Mmmmm.....
January 12th, 2005  
Redneck
 
 
Nevadans - Better looking Texans.



Quote:
34. You can be satisfied with a meal consisting only of a hunk of bread with flavored flour and milk (a delicacy known as "biscuits n' gravy").
And there's no better food. Mother of mercy, now I'm homesick.
--
Boots
January 12th, 2005  
pimp_squeak
 
(36) You've had sex ed and drivers ed in the same vehicle
January 12th, 2005  
Missileer
 
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redneck
Nevadans - Better looking Texans.



Quote:
34. You can be satisfied with a meal consisting only of a hunk of bread with flavored flour and milk (a delicacy known as "biscuits n' gravy").
And there's no better food. Mother of mercy, now I'm homesick.
Well, yeah, but not without a glass of cold buttermilk.
January 13th, 2005  
Missileer
 
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by pimp_squeak
(36) You've had sex ed and drivers ed in the same vehicle
Yep! And both with the same person. Ms Summers, mmmmm.......!
January 13th, 2005  
Themrose89
 
I'm a Texan and I know exactly what you mean, despite a few misconseptions here and there. What was sex ed and drivers ed about, id did NOT get that one.
January 13th, 2005  
Joe252
 
that funny hahahaha....I believe just a few of thoughs are off.....but the rest are very true
January 13th, 2005  
Missileer
 
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Patriotreturns
I'm a Texan and I know exactly what you mean, despite a few misconseptions here and there. What was sex ed and drivers ed about, id did NOT get that one.
It means you learned to drive and the facts of life at the same time. One in the front seat and the other in the back seat.
January 13th, 2005  
Themrose89
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Missileer
Quote:
Originally Posted by pimp_squeak
(36) You've had sex ed and drivers ed in the same vehicle
Yep! And both with the same person. Ms Summers, mmmmm.......!
I'm no mod, but keep it clean guys.