I've got some good news:)

hey hey

Gelinas said:
I've got an update about the father...since he is in his first year of university he doesn't want any distractions :x he told me that I should have made him wear a condom and it's my fault that he didn't so I should have to raise the baby. I don't want it to sound like I'm the "victim" here, but what was he doing sleeping with someone who's only 16? The idiot says a lot of things, I guess I was just stupid enough to believe what he said.

In that fecking case hun CLAMP THE GIT FOR CHILD SUPPORT!!!!! He didn't have a problem sticking his c*ck in you so why blame you! Ok you should of both used protection but how dare he claim its your fault the selfish git!

That makes me so angry!!

Don't know what age of consent in USA is but in UK its 16 so if it is same there he has not broken the law!

By the way does his parents know whats happening? I'm sure they'd like to know a grandchild is on way and that thier darling son is an idiot!
 
Gelinas said:
Vitaly said:
Damn; So how old is he anyway?

19.

Sexybeast: I live in Alberta, Canada ;)

His parents do know, but they never did like me much, thought I was to young for him.

Didn't any of your friends say shit about him being 19 and you being 16? I know that if a buddy of mine goes out with some freshman, he'll be heckled by myself and other males of the same age.
 
Vitaly said:
Didn't any of your friends say shit about him being 19 and you being 16? I know that if a buddy of mine goes out with some freshman, he'll be heckled by myself and other males of the same age.

My friends did, but not his. I'm sure they knew what he wanted with me, I just wish I'd been a little smarter to see it myself.
 
Yeah that's usually what happens when there is a gap of about 3+ years during High-School. It's like think about it wouldn't you be a loser if after you already went to college you went back to date high-school kids?
 
Yeah, I guess you're right. But it wasn't like I hadn't dated older guys before, and let me tell you, this guy sure was handsome.

And like I said before I was only dating him to piss me dad off :lol:
 
Gelinas said:
Yeah, I guess you're right. But it wasn't like I hadn't dated older guys before, and let me tell you, this guy sure was handsome.

And like I said before I was only dating him to piss me dad off :lol:

Yeah, I understand; but sadly that backfired like no other.
 
Gelinas there are a few things I'd like to say to you. First of all, you are 16, very young, but still old enough to know that sexual intercourse is designed to make babies. And if you don't want them, then you need to protect yourself. If this was an act that you participated in willingly, then you need to back off on blaming anyone. You both hold equal share in the responsiblity. It does not matter he if he is 'older' You and only you are responsible for what you do with your body. If you were an unwillinging partner in the sexual act, then you need to contact the authorities and file charges against him.

You can no longer be a little girl and poor me. You are soon to be a mom. Which means you have to suck it up and do what it is you have to do to raise that child properly. You don't need to answer to anyone or allow anyone to back you into a corner about the hows and whys you are pregnant. You certainly cannot undo it. (well, I guess abortion is an undo of sorts, but obviously it is not an option to you) So really, the fact that you did or didn't use protection, or did or didn't think about it is a dead issue. The pregnancy exists.

Anya had it right. You need to pursue financial help from the father. File for child support rights as soon as the child is born. Even if he is not working now, he eventually will be. And he will owe you from the day the child was awarded support. Like I said, equal responsibility. You cannot blame him, he cannot blame you. But you both share in the burdens of raising a child. I am sure some guy is going to chime in here with the "man doesn't get a choice" issue. Too bad, you play, you pay.
 
I know I have a big part in me getting pregnant, and why shouldn't I do the "poor me" thing? I wouldn't of been in this position in the first place if my parents had paid attention to me. I also wouldn't of lost all but 3 of my friends because of this. You're right, I will have to suck it up, but I also know that I have 4 months until the baby comes, and that's a long ways away.
 
"I am sure some guy is going to chime in here with the "man doesn't get a choice" issue. Too bad, you play, you pay."

Courtney, I couldn't agree with you more.


Gelinas, having lost "friends" myself when life hit a rough stretch, I'll give you something to think about. It's when times are tough that you find out who your _real_ friends are. Look at it this way, you no longer have to spend time and emotional effort on people who never were really your friends to begin with and you can find the value in those who remain and always were your friends.

Sorry but I'm not going to let you off the hook with blaming your parents. You can blame them for the emotional state you were in at the time but not the choice you made. That was your choice and the father's alone. Courtney's right. It's past time to be considering blame and move on to what needs to be done _now_.
 
Charge_7 said:
Sorry but I'm not going to let you off the hook with blaming your parents. You can blame them for the emotional state you were in at the time but not the choice you made. That was your choice and the father's alone. Courtney's right. It's past time to be considering blame and move on to what needs to be done _now_.

I can blame them for it because the emotional state I was in effected the choice I made ;) and I personally think my parents should blame themselves and not be so upset with me. Sure I made a mistake, but doesn't everyone? I will move on, but I'm still a long ways away from having this baby.

The reason I brought up my parents in the first place was so that all the parents in these forums will know not to play favorites with their children. Look at what happens when you do!
 
Gelinas, my wife and I married at 17 because of the same reason as you and have been together and happy since Oct. 20th, 1962. We had two boys and 1 girl. I know that the male of the species is the aggressor in these situations. It's just the way we're built. My daughter was pregnant at 16 and we pretty well raised my Grandson and made an exceptional man out of him. All of my family has had the chance to attend College and most of us finished. We are a very supportive family and if one of the kids needed a car to get to school or work, I found a way to get them one. You have to have family support. I made my kids a promise that they could live with my wife and I until they felt they were able to support themselves and all did. I said that to say this. Life handed us a problem and we turned it into an opportunity. I know my story is not the norm but I believe that anyone can overcome just about any problem as long as they have a supportive family/friends.
 
Missileer said:
Gelinas, my wife and I married at 17 because of the same reason as you and have been together and happy since Oct. 20th, 1962. We had two boys and 1 girl. I know that the male of the species is the aggressor in these situations. It's just the way we're built. My daughter was pregnant at 16 and we pretty well raised my Grandson and made an exceptional man out of him. All of my family has had the chance to attend College and most of us finished. We are a very supportive family and if one of the kids needed a car to get to school or work, I found a way to get them one. You have to have family support. I made my kids a promise that they could live with my wife and I until they felt they were able to support themselves and all did. I said that to say this. Life handed us a problem and we turned it into an opportunity. I know my story is not the norm but I believe that anyone can overcome just about any problem as long as they have a supportive family/friends.

Well I hope I wont have to marry this guy. But I'm happy for you, it's nice to see a man step up to the plate. Unfortunately I'm 99% sure this guy wont, so I agree with you about having supportive friends/family. Even if for some strange reason my parents decide to not support me I'm sure I could raise this kid on my own. :D After all the mother on "Gilmore Girls" did, so how hard could it be? :lol:
 
Vitaly said:
Do you even talk to the guy, after you told him about the pregnancy that is?

Unfortunately I do....I've had a few run ins with him, all of which have ended badly. I didn't even know I was pregnant for...well I'm not exactly sure how long, but I do know is that I hid it from my parents for a while. I wore baggy pants and oversized hoodies, so if you ever see your sister/daughter wearing stuff like that better make sure she's not pregnant. ;)
 
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