If you are over 50, you are qualified to join AARP‏

I3BrigPvSk

The Viking



AARP Information

Questions and Answers from an AARP Forum
Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore under fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you are done you will have a place to live.
Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the Bible. Isthat true? Where can it be found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92: 'And Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt ...'
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60+ year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses..
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless.. It will usually pull them out.
Q: Why should 60+ year old people usevalet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.
Q: Is it common for 60+ year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is a problem.
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.
Q: Where should 60+ year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 60+ year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: 'Gosh, I remember these.
 
Last edited:
Questions about Gov. Romney’s religion and the latest news from the Vatican brought this old one to mind.
A Cardinal rushed into the Popes private chambers. “Your Eminence I have some good news and some bad news.”
The Pope ask for the good news first, “Our Savior has returned and he is on the phone!” declared the Cardinal.
After hearing this the Pope asked “What news could possibly be bad?”
The Cardinal said “He is calling from Salt Lake City.”
 
Back
Top