Four Lessons Of Business...




 
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Four Lessons Of Business...
 
October 14th, 2006  
Team Infidel
 
 

Topic: Four Lessons Of Business...


Four Lessons Of Business...

Lesson Number One
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?”
  • The crow answered: “Sure, why not.”
  • So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
  • All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.
“Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull.
“They’re packed with nutrients.”
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Management Lesson:
B******t might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.
Lesson Number Three
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
The brain said, “I should be Boss because I control the whole body’s responses and functions.”
The feet said, “We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go.”
The hands said, “We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money.”
And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the ******* spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the ******* being the Boss. So the ******* went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
Eventually they all decided that the ******* should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the ****!
Management Lesson:
You don’t need brains to be a Boss - any ******* will do.
Lesson Number Four
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.
As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung and promptly dug him out and ate him!
Management Lessons:
  • 1) Not everyone who drops **** on you is your enemy.
  • 2) Not everyone who gets you out of **** is your friend.
  • 3) And when you’re in deep ****, keep your mouth shut!
October 14th, 2006  
tomtom22
 
 
Posted by you before:
TWO MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE
The waste is a terrible thing to mind!
October 14th, 2006  
Rob Henderson
 
 
Well...The lesson with the Boss wasnt in that one...
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Four Lessons Of Business...
October 15th, 2006  
Sevens
 
 
That's funny!
 


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