"Family Matters" Discussion/Debate

With various reasons in mind, is there a point a family should stop having children?

  • Yes (State Further Opinion in Thread Please)

    Votes: 7 53.8%
  • No (State Further Opinion in Thread Please)

    Votes: 3 23.1%
  • Middle Ground (State Further Opinion in Thread Please)

    Votes: 3 23.1%

  • Total voters
    13

pixiedustboo

Redfidelboo
17kids.jpg





The Duggar family had it's 17th child born recently. We have a discussion going on at another forum I frequent about this topic and I was interested to know the opinions of more people at another site.

What is your personal take on having this many children? Not just the "number" per say, but think about mom and dad's attention, the other children, etc... I am entangled in this topic dude to my own opinions [obviously this does not affect the family - just for discussion/debate purpose] in the matter and I'd love to see some more views on this.
 
Well, they all seem well clothed and happy in the photo. So long as they are not disadvantaged in any way i guess it's OK.

In the 1950s we had a Dutch family in our street with a similar number of kids and they were as happy as larks, and as far as I know, all grew into well adjusted adults. They also looked after one Grandparent. A true extended family.

I used to like them because at Christmas they invited many of the local kids around for Oliebollen (Dutch Donuts).
 

Being a little more sensitive of other people's opinions, this is my personal take on this topic and it's not meant to offend anyone with my opinions or wording.

It comes to a point - in my opinion - that you lose something when you are pushing them out as fast as they are coming in. I believe being blessed with the ability to carry children is something wonderful and something to be cherished. However, I also believe those children need to be cherished not only during conception and the nine months of carrying them, but while they are growing into adults. I don't believe that the parents aren't giving their "all" to their children when they are focused on the upcoming new children. (Being that this is something that has happened every year of every one of their previous children's life).

I am under the impression from things said at this other board that this family is not planning on ever using birth control because they do not believe in it for personal (religious) reasons. I do not believe that birth control is evil, unless it is used with an evil intent.


I truly do think this is sad. I'm not sad about her having a child, I'm sad for the OTHER children. "Mommy and daddy are too busy getting it on and planning for another baby, so you go do your own thing and watch out for the younger brother and sisters." (Not that I find bigger families bad either, I think interaction between siblings is a very special thing, but really, when are they going to quit?) This is the 17th one...and she's only 40, so say she still has several more years to go...25 kids? 30 kids? So much for bonding experiences with mom and dad for the previous children.


My grandma came from a large family, with nine brothers and sisters, she being the eldest of the group and she is still the rock for her brothers and sisters.


:::However:::

Children should not get less attention in hopes of getting them to be better adults. That is my whole personal conflict with this family. Those children need time to be able to BE children and not have to be the mommy while the REAL mommy is to busy giving birth and carrying another child.

Playing mommy during childhood is entirely different from having to BE mommy in childhood.

People seem to have a lot of issues with 14 year olds having to raise babies, yet this what was probably happening very early on in the older children's life in this family. It's not fair for the other kids to not have time with mom and dad too.



 
Thats a tough one...i know most would say well as long as they can afford raising those kids then its ok...but i would have to say that yes there should be a stopping point....i mean pretty soon their kids would be starting to have kids...and then that would take away from them enjoying their grandkids... and i just think that woman is crazy going through labor 17 times lol...thats like a family down the road from me...last i heard (from a few years ago) they had like 14 kids and they were from ages 6months - 19. The 19 yr old girl was married and having a baby at the same time as her mother was having another one..they too said it was against their religion to use birth control and that as long as God was giving them kids they'd have them....
 
Overall, it's bad to have too many kids. Overpopulation is one of the biggest threats of the 21st century.

However, if you are lucky enough to live in a developed country like America and you can afford it, it's your right. But you better be a damn good parent.
 
Im one of 6 children, and if it wern't for the fact that we are so far apart in age (2-33 years old) then I know I would be neglected, not because my parents don't love me, but because they are so busy.

I think that each child should be given lots of attention and care, because it's horrible having to grow up too fast, and having to be so responsible when youre only 8 years old. It's hard to have to think every day about the parents who are always there for their kids, and always cheering them on. I remember having to wait 3 hours for my dad to pick me up once. I was so mad and embarassed and my dad didn't even get it.

STOP IT, STOP HAVING SO MANY DAMN KIDS BECAUSE, UNLESS YOU DON'T WORK, THEN YOU DON'T HAVE THE TIME!!
 
personally i think having that many kids is irresponsible


1: you wont have the time to look after/nurture each child as an individual

2: IMO it's hugely irresposible to do this in an already over crowded world
 
Its their life and their family. As long as they aren't on welfare and no one is being abused... LEAVE THEM ALONE. I am quite fed up with people dictating to other people how to run their personal affairs. If no one is being hurt and it doesn't directly affect YOU, then piss off and take care of your own life.

NOTE: Not directed at anyone in particular just my exact thoughts verbatim as I thought them.
 
Personally I am more of the "small family type of person, so I think anything more then maybe 7 kids is pushing it. If you have 14 kids and are still intending to have more, then I find it VERY difficult to believe that those kids will be as well raised as a family who has 2 kids, unless both parents are unemployed.
 
As long as that family is healthy and happy, they can have as many children as they want.

Who are we to tell others how big thier families should be, have we suddenly all become Mullahs?
 
Well if they can afford them and bring them up with love and kindness I would say that it is down to them. What I do not agree with is families that have huge families and leave them to run run wild.
 
Okay, as someone who's been on the recieving end of alot of these stereotypes, even though my family may not have 17 children, I'd like to comment that having a lot of kids doesnt make you a poor parent. I may have more responsibilities that have to do with family, but I have never been neglected or made into a slave. There are plenty of families I knew growing up with only 2 children where the kids spent less time with their parents than I do even now. 17 children would be a challenge, but just because they're growing up in a different family environment doesnt mean that it's any less nurturing than a "Normal" childhood. If anything, a larger family should mean a greater support unit, not a home full of neglect and slavery. I think that as long as the children are happy and healthy than there's no one with the right to comment on how awful it must be. I'm sure they're thinking about how awful it must be to come home to a quiet house with siblings who are too different in age to relate to.
 
Overdramatic much?

Hmm...so it's okay to make slaves outta the older ones?
Teaches them responsibility, something sorely lacking in the general populace. Any means to instill a sense of personal responsibility is a good thing. Full stop.
 
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