Topic: West Texas Cowboy

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May 11th, 2006   Post 1
5.56X45mm
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Post; West Texas Cowboy


Subject: West Texas Cowboy

A West Texas cowboy was herding his herd in a remote pasture when
Suddenly a Brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a Young Man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
sunglasses and YSL tie, Leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If
I tell you exactly how many cows And Calves you have in your herd,will
you give me a calf?"

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
Peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
Connects it To his AT&T cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the
Internet, Where he Calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get
an exact fix on his Location Which he then feeds to another NASA
satellite that scans the area in An Ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
Exports it To an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.
Within seconds,He Receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image
has been processed And the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL
database through an ODBC Connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his
Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives A response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his
Hi-tech,miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the
Cowboy and says, "You have Exactly 1586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the
Cowboy. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks
On amused as The young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly
What Your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay,why
Not?"

"You're a consultant for the National Democratic Party." says the
Cowboy.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess That?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy.

"You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get
Paid for An answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You
tried to Show me How much smarter than me you are; and you don't know
a damn thing about cows........ Now give me back my dog."
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So this is how democracy dies.... to thunderous applause.
 
May 11th, 2006   Post 2
tomtom22
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Heard the Austrailian version a while back. Charge 7 also posted his version here: Winning The Bet
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"It doesn't take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle." - Norman Schwarskopf, Commander of Desert Storm Operations

Last edited by tomtom22; May 11th, 2006 at 04:15.
 
July 18th, 2006   Post 3
Rob Henderson
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Hehehe. Thats good..haahaa
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"Life is a tragedy to those who feel, and a comedy to those who think."- Fortune Cookie
 
July 19th, 2006   Post 4
AFSteliga
Cadet Moderator
 
 
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Nice one.
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Canadian Forces School of Aerospace Control Operations
QL3 0027

Per ardua ad astra
 
July 21st, 2006   Post 5
Italian Guy
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Gear

Good one.
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"Freedom is the sure possession of those alone who have the courage to defend it".
Pericles.


 
August 5th, 2006   Post 6
AJChenMPH
Forum Health Inspector
 
 
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Bump. So I sent this to a few of the contractors in my shop with the question: "So, is this representative of you guys?"

One response back: "Sure does. Except for the cattle thing. And Rob would have brokebacked the cowboy while Mitch chased after the heifers."
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Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!"
-- Isaiah 6:8
 
August 6th, 2006   Post 7
Sevens
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LOL Funny!!
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August 6th, 2006   Post 8
Team Infidel
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Pretty funny.
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August 29th, 2006   Post 9
AmericanSweetheart
Primus Pilus
 
 
Gear

funny funny!
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