Topic: Tech Support. May I Help You?

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July 7th, 2006   Post 1
Missileer
Nuclear Duck Hunter
 
 
Gear

Post; Tech Support. May I Help You?


Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...
================
Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left
of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
=================
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah........ ...........thank you.
==================
Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.
=================
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer:! OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is
there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does
work...
=====================
Tech support: Your password is the small letter a as in
apple, a capital letter V as n Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
===========================
Customer: can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
==========================
Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how
do I get the circle around it?
======================
__________________



“War is an ugly thing but not the ugliest of things; the decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feelings which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse.”
—John Stuart Mill
 
July 8th, 2006   Post 2
chronoserpent
Optio
 
 
Gear

ROFL! So sad, but true!
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Midshipman Third Class
Trojan Battalion NROTC
 
July 8th, 2006   Post 3
moving0target
Primus Pilus
 
 
Gear

Reminds of my days in computer tech support in South Carolina. Generally the questions weren't as intelligent as those above.

"I couldn't get on American Online last night. Was the internets down?"

---

Him: I can't get on the internets.
Me: Who is your service provider?
Him: My what?
Me: The company that provides you with internet access...like AOL.
Him: You mean American Online?
Me: Sure.
Him: I don't have one.
Me: I'll help you set it up.
I walked him through various steps to install AOL and, after about 30 minutes, everything was installed, but we couldn't get a dial tone.
Me: Sir, is your computer hooked up correctly?
Him: ...
Me: Check the phone cord in the back. Plug it in the jack...yadda yadda yadda
Him: Phone cord?
Me: Right, from the phone jack in the wall to your computer modem.
Him: I don't have a telephone. Lemme run borrow my neighbor's. He's got a cordless.
Me: ...
 
July 8th, 2006   Post 4
Sevens
Forum Brat
 
 
Gear

Rotflmao
__________________
Woe to the man or woman who thinks that the capacity to kill is not lurking behind these civilized eyes. -- James Woods

Clear eyes. Full hearts. Can't lose.
 
July 8th, 2006   Post 5
SwordFish_13
Tribuni Angusticlavii
 
 
Hi,

THis is Nuffin ... .... Nuffin I tell ya ... i will post some of My Experiences later ..
 
July 9th, 2006   Post 6
NCdt Steliga
Cadet Moderator
 
 
Gear


Nice one.
__________________
'Truth. Duty. Valour.
Blow out you bugles over the rich dead
There's none of these so lonely and poor of old
But dying has made us rarer gifts than gold'

Inscription on the top of the Memorial Arch at RMC Kingston
 
January 7th, 2007   Post 7
tomtom22
Chief Engineer
 
 
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__________________
"It doesn't take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle." - Norman Schwarskopf, Commander of Desert Storm Operations
 
April 19th, 2007   Post 8
Team Infidel
Milforum's Postmaster
 
 
Gear



oh goodness.. that sounds like my mom when she got her computer
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