Topic: Speeding Marine

Anonymous · October 6th, 2003

A classic from the woodpile:

One day a police officer clocked a car driven by a marine at over 90 miles per hour. The marine, one of our older military veterans of three wars, immediately pulled over once he saw the blinking lights of the black and white Dudley Do-right on his bumper.

Marine: Hi officer. Did I do anything wrong?

Officer: Sir I clocked you at 90 miles per hour. May I see your license please?

Marine: Naw that aint possible. I lost my license when I was charged with the DUI about 4 years back.

Officer: I see. The can I see your registration?

Marine: No that won’t be possible either. See this is a stolen car.

Officer: stolen car?

Marine. Yep. The guy i stole it from is in the trunk.

Officer: he's in the trunk?

Marine: yep. Bopped him on the head, cut him up into a hundred pieces, put em in plastic bags and popped him right into the trunk. You want to see him?

Officer: no. You just stay in the car. The officer goes back to his car.

Five minutes later, five police cars roll up and surround the vehicle. The police captain strolls up to the car, with a drawn gun.

Captain: Sir, would you mind getting out of your car?

Marine: Sure sir. And he gets out

Captain: sir I just received a report from one of my men that he had just apprehended a driver without a license. Do you have a license to drive sir?

Marine sure do and pulls out his driver license from his wallet.

Captain: I also received word that the man was driving a stolen car, with possibly a body in the trunk. Is this the case?

Marine: Naw sir, this is my car. He pulls the registration out of the glove compartment, and hands it to the captain.

Captain: would you mind opening your trunk?

Marine: sure sir. He then opened the trunk to reveal...nothing.

Captain: I am very puzzled. My man reported that he had apprehended an unlicensed driver, driving a stolen car, with a body in the trunk. None of that seems to be true.

Marine: yeah, and I bet the little liar even told you I was speeding didn’t he?

Works every time.

Mark Conley · October 6th, 2003

actually posted by yours truly. dont know why it didnt display my name

later :P

GuyontheRight · October 7th, 2003

Nice

Redleg · October 9th, 2003

A classic!

Darkmb101 · May 1st, 2004

Nice.

Bentley · May 2nd, 2004

I think ive heard a joke pretty similar to that.

Razor · May 2nd, 2004

That's a good one.

USYM_1SG · May 2nd, 2004

sweet

Marksman · May 6th, 2004

I know taht one on my lenguage!! lol

C/2nd Lt Robot · June 12th, 2004

Im gonna try that one day, wonder what happened to the cop after that one.

October 6th, 2003	Post 1
Anonymous Guest	Post; Speeding Marine A classic from the woodpile: One day a police officer clocked a car driven by a marine at over 90 miles per hour. The marine, one of our older military veterans of three wars, immediately pulled over once he saw the blinking lights of the black and white Dudley Do-right on his bumper. Marine: Hi officer. Did I do anything wrong? Officer: Sir I clocked you at 90 miles per hour. May I see your license please? Marine: Naw that aint possible. I lost my license when I was charged with the DUI about 4 years back. Officer: I see. The can I see your registration? Marine: No that won’t be possible either. See this is a stolen car. Officer: stolen car? Marine. Yep. The guy i stole it from is in the trunk. Officer: he's in the trunk? Marine: yep. Bopped him on the head, cut him up into a hundred pieces, put em in plastic bags and popped him right into the trunk. You want to see him? Officer: no. You just stay in the car. The officer goes back to his car. Five minutes later, five police cars roll up and surround the vehicle. The police captain strolls up to the car, with a drawn gun. Captain: Sir, would you mind getting out of your car? Marine: Sure sir. And he gets out Captain: sir I just received a report from one of my men that he had just apprehended a driver without a license. Do you have a license to drive sir? Marine sure do and pulls out his driver license from his wallet. Captain: I also received word that the man was driving a stolen car, with possibly a body in the trunk. Is this the case? Marine: Naw sir, this is my car. He pulls the registration out of the glove compartment, and hands it to the captain. Captain: would you mind opening your trunk? Marine: sure sir. He then opened the trunk to reveal...nothing. Captain: I am very puzzled. My man reported that he had apprehended an unlicensed driver, driving a stolen car, with a body in the trunk. None of that seems to be true. Marine: yeah, and I bet the little liar even told you I was speeding didn’t he? Works every time.

October 6th, 2003	Post 2
Mark Conley Tribuni Angusticlavii	Post; speeding marine actually posted by yours truly. dont know why it didnt display my name later :P __________________ “If we should have to fight, we should be prepared to do so from the neck up instead of from the neck down.”— General James H. Doolittle, USAAF

October 7th, 2003	Post 3
GuyontheRight Tribuni Angusticlavii	Nice __________________ No Voice

May 1st, 2004	Post 5
Darkmb101 Tribunus Laticlavius	Nice. __________________ on a permanent vacation....will visit every now and then. see arcade hidden message!!! Life is short and pointless, be happy and live it.

May 2nd, 2004	Post 7
Razor Optio	That's a good one. __________________ \"Reaching the pinnacle of combative competency does not occur through some mystical transformation. It\'s acquired through persistence and lot\'s of hard work.\" ~War Machine Philosophy.

October 9th, 2003	Post 4
Redleg The fire is everything... Gear	A classic!

May 2nd, 2004	Post 6
Bentley Milites Gregarius	I think ive heard a joke pretty similar to that.

May 6th, 2004	Post 9
Marksman Tribuni Angusticlavii	I know taht one on my lenguage!! lol

June 12th, 2004	Post 10
C/2nd Lt Robot Tribunus Laticlavius	Im gonna try that one day, wonder what happened to the cop after that one. __________________ C/Capt "Robot", CAP (ret) NBB '06 Alpha Flight NBB '07 Delta Flight

Topic: Speeding Marine

Post; Speeding Marine

Post; speeding marine