Retirees

About Retirees


  International Military Forums > The Off-Topic Zone > Military Jokes and Humor Forum > Non-Military Jokes and Humor Stuff
User Name
Password

 
January 9th, 2006   #1
tomtom22
 
 

Retirees info


Retirees: The Whole Truth, Nothing But...

Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

Question: How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb?
Answer:Only one, but it might take all day.

Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.

Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer: The term comes with a 10 percent discount.

Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.

Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answers: They are the only ones who have the time.

Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer: NUTS!

Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer:They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.

Question:What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answers: The never ending Coffee Break.

Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer:If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.





"It doesn't take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle." - Norman Schwarskopf, Commander of Desert Storm Operations
 
January 10th, 2006   #2
MightyMacbeth
 
 
heh, yeah.. the good ol life.. sounds warm and peaceful


~when a man does his best, what else is there? Gen.George S.Patton

 
January 10th, 2006   #3
AFSteliga
 
 
Nice.


MCpl K. Steliga
Ground Controller
Wing Operations/Air Traffic Control
14 Wing Greenwood
Royal Canadian Air Force

Per ardua ad astra
 
October 5th, 2007   #4
Team Infidel
 
 
ah one day i aspire to be retired


 
October 5th, 2007   #5
CrazyLilCajun
 
 
Haha.....


"Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway. " - John Wayne
 
October 5th, 2007   #6
senojekips
 
 
I resemble those remarks, Tomtom.

Only last week a guy I know sent me a poem about the Navy, y'know all that BS about the salt spray in your face and destroyers dashing into the fray. At the bottom he said, "It's stirring stuff isn't it"? to which I answered. "Yeah,.... it makes me want to get another cup of coffee and go and sit somewhere under a 100 foot gum tree".


"I am totally responsible for what I write,... however I cannot be held responsible for your complete inability to understand"