# Why do the numbers on phones go down while the numbers on calculators go up?
# If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?
# Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
# Can you make a candle out of your earwax?
# Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?
# If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
# Can you get cornered in a round room?
# Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
# If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?
# If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?
# Why is a square meal served on round plates?
# If mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
# Why do they say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?
# You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
# Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
# Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
# Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
# Why is the word "abbreviate" so long?
# Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"?
# Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?
# Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light?
# Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?
# Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
# Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?
# Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
# Why do they call them "apartments" when they are all stuck together?
# If your feet smell and your nose runs, are you built upside down?
# Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
# Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
# Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
# Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
# What's another word for synonym?
# What is a free gift? Aren't all gifts free?
# What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
# What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
# What do sheep count when they can't sleep?
# There are 24 hours in a day, and 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
# Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
# If you have an open mind why don't your brains fall out?
# If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
# If the cops arrest a mime, do they have to tell him he has the right to remain silent?
# If superglue is so good, why doesn't it stick to the side of the tube?
# If quitters never win, and winners never quit, who came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
# If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?
# If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
# If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
# If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
# If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?
# If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
# If a chronic liar tells you he is a chronic liar do you believe him?
# How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?
# How is it possible to have a civil war?
# How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike?
# Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
# Why do they call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere but call it a hemorrhoid when its in your ass?
# How does Santa get into a house that doesn't have a chimney?
# Why is it good to be a Daddy's girl, but bad to be a Momma's boy?
# why do you get on a bus and a train but get into a car?
# Why is it that when a person tells you there's over a million stars in the universe you believe them, but if someone tells you there's wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
# Is a hot car cool or is a cool car hot?
# Is a man full of wonder a wonderful man?
# Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the counter?
# Why is a person that handles your money called a BROKER?
# Why do you click on start to exit Microsoft Windows?
# If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?
# Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
# IF MONEY DOES NOT GROW ON TREES, WHY DO BANKS HAVE BRANCHES?
# Can good looking Eskimo girls be called hot?
# Is there anything easier done than said?
# If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?
# Just what was the "Baby On Board" sign for? Did it help us decide which car not to hit in case of an accident?
# Why do people say, "you've been working like a dog" when dogs just sit around all day?
# When a car is for sale and it has a balloon on it, does the balloon come with it?
# Why isn't the word 'gullible' in the dictionary?
# Why is it when we ask for the check in a restaurant they bring us a bill?
# If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
# Seeing as cupid is so good at matchmaking, does he have a girlfriend?
# Why do they put Canadian bacon on Hawaiian Pizza?
# How come stealing from one book is plagiarism, but stealing from many is research?
# If money is the root of all evil then how come churches ask for it?
# Why is there an L in NOEL?
# What are those little things on the end of your shoelaces called?
# Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?
# What does the T in T-Shirt really mean?
# How can someone be dirt poor, and another be filthy rich?
# When you put 'THE' and 'IRS' together, it forms 'THEIRS'. Coincidence? I think not?
# If your plan is having no plan, do you have a plan?
# Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same as the words "the" and "rapist" put together?
# Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone?
# If you are born on February 29 of a leap year, when is your birthday?
# If a water spins clockwise when it drains in the northern hemisphere, and water spins counterclockwise when it drains in the southern hemisphere...which way does it spin at the equator?
# Why are things typed up but written down?
# Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?
# What does OK actually mean?
# Why do donuts have holes?
# Do the different "M&M's"? colors taste different?
# Why is it we have the weight of the world on our shoulders but have to get it off our chests?

OK = all correct

a redneck from the civil war didn't know how to spell so he put OK for

oll korrect

interesting.

Interesting. Good post, Xander.

Whoa...*begins to ponder*

Originally Posted by NCdt Steliga

Whoa...*begins to ponder*

Haha

I know these are jokes. But here are a few explained.

Originally Posted by xander

# Why do the numbers on phones go down while the numbers on calculators go up?

If phones started with 1 at the bottom then the alphabet would be in reverse order. That would be sort of confusing. And a calculators keypad resembled that of a cash register.

Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?

The english language is less than a logical construct. But flammable is used for nonnative speakers.

If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan

The enterior of the pan is grit-blasted, and a primer coat is applied and baked on. Another layer of Polytetrafluoroethylene (PTFE) is applied, baked and dried again. A third coat is applied, baked and dried once more. And about the only thing that sticks to PTFE is PTFE. The three layers create an inseperable bond between the layers of PTFE and the primer coat sticks to the rough metal surface.

alright guys, these are theoretical yet answerable, but dont answer