A man was flying a hot air balloon and realized that he was lost. He reduced his height and spotted a man down below. He lowered the balloon further and shouted "Excuse me, can you help me? I made a promise to meet someone a half hour ago, but I don't know where the hell I am."

The man below said, "Yes, you're in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet off this field. You're between 40 and 42 degrees north latitude and between 58 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"I say, you must be an NCO," said the balloonist.

"I am ", replied the NCO, "How did you know?"

"Well," said the balloonist, "Everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with this information and the fact is, I'm still bloody lost and I'm still going to be late."

"You must be an officer!", said the NCO.

"I am", replied the surprised balloonist, "How did you know that?"

"Well," said the NCO, "You don't know where you are or where you are going. You've made a promise to someone that you can't keep and you expect me to solve all your problems. The fact is you're in exactly the same position you were in before you told me your problems, but now it's somehow my fault."

How bloody true!!!!!

I don´t understand it..!!!

Originally Posted by 42RM

I don´t understand it..!!!

A Rupert^^^^^^^^^

Originally Posted by BritinAfrica

A Rupert^^^^^^^^^

Cocky Bastard

You know, my Troop is notorious for their sense of humor.

One morning, one of the lads came to me and asked if they could pull a joke on the NCO's and if I would help. It sounded like a good plan - so I said yes. So when morning briefing was over, I gave the command: “Any questions?-Okay then “All you idiots fall out.”

As the NCO´s wandered away, all Marines remained at attention.

An old joke- but still works.

Originally Posted by 42RM

I don´t understand it..!!!

You must be an officer, too!

Originally Posted by viper2007

You must be an officer, too!

And a gentleman, not forgetting.

Originally Posted by 42RM

And a gentleman, not forgetting.

cough cough cough wheeze. Bloody fags(cigarette's not poofs!) will be the death of me

Originally Posted by BritinAfrica

cough cough cough wheeze. Bloody fags(cigarette's not poofs!) will be the death of me

Sir, Do you question an officer's honor? Prepare to choose your second, Sir!

Originally Posted by Der Alte

Sir, Do you question an officer's honor? Prepare to choose your second, Sir!

Trooper you've got the job, it's feather dusters at 200 yards.