A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 35 lbs. as soon as possible due to
very serious health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do
it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS
PROGRAM.

"Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls them
up and subscribes to the 3-day/5 lb. weight loss program. The next day
there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands before him a
voluptuous, athletic, 19-year-old young lady dressed in nothing but Nike
running shoes and a sign around her neck. She introduces herself as a
representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch
me, you can have me!"

Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing
and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. After they are
through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way this company
does business!"

The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens.
On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 5 lbs.
as promised. He calls the company and orders their 5-day/10 lb. program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but
Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch
me, you can have me." He's out the door and after her like a shot.

This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but
when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. For the next four days,
the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day, he weighs
himself and found he has lost another 10 lbs., as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/25 lb.
program. "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our
most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies. "I haven't felt this good
in years." The next day there's a knock at the door and when he opens it he
finds a muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes
and a sign around his neck that reads,



"If I catch you, you're mine."

Old but gold.

omg .... I think I died laughing!!!

WOOOOOOOOAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAA!!!!!!!!!

Funny.

OMG lol my sides hurt form laughing