The Homeless Man

About The Homeless Man


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March 6th, 2006   #1
tomtom22
 
 

The Homeless Man info


A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money.
Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf, and sex."




"It doesn't take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle." - Norman Schwarskopf, Commander of Desert Storm Operations
 
March 6th, 2006   #2
armlesscadet
 
 
lol the worst part was giving up the golf


C/1stSgt AFJROTC

Death smiles at us all.
The US Marine smiles back
 
March 7th, 2006   #3
AFSteliga
 
 
Pretty good.


MCpl K. Steliga
Ground Controller
Wing Operations/Air Traffic Control
14 Wing Greenwood
Royal Canadian Air Force

Per ardua ad astra
 
March 7th, 2006   #4
Navy Boy
 
 
That is so true lol.


This is Vice Admiral J. Kevin Moran

Semper Fortis
 
March 8th, 2006   #5
deerslayer
 
 
Shame that he had to give up the fishing... the heck with the golf, the desire to misuse a club is downright impossible to ignore.

Think of it as a painting entitled "Assault, with Intent to Commit Murder- Golf Ball"


Screwing over bureaucratic organizations, one paper tiger at a time.

Trespassers will be shot and fed to the dogs.
 
October 29th, 2007   #6
Team Infidel
 
 
not bad....


 
October 29th, 2007   #7
CrazyLilCajun
 
 
hahaha..funny


"Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway. " - John Wayne
 
October 30th, 2007   #8
Sevens
 
 
Pretty funny.


Not liking me will always be your problem. Never mine.
 
May 28th, 2010   #9
Korean Seaboy
 
 
I've quit golf after getting bit by one ball that I hit myself, and look at me now!!!!!
Holed up in an urban city where the infamous ajummas (middle-aged ladies) that have no manners throw purses to secure a seat in the sub and looks at me with a dirty look (that actually happened once)