About Check before you touch
|February 28th, 2007||#1|
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Check before you touch info
I was visiting a couple in my parish and arrived at their house to find a man rubbing his bloodied forehead and covered in grease and dirt from having been under a car in the driveway (repairing it).
I didn't recognise the man and asked him if he was OK and who he was.
He said he was the next door neighbour and as a mechanic had agreed to his neighbour's (the man I was visiting and his wife) request to help repair or replace a part under the car. The injured man said he was under the jacked-up car when the owner left in the borrowed neighbour's car to purchase a needed part.
While away, the owners wife came out with lemonade and chips for her husband and saw "him" under the car. But she also noticed that his private member was hanging out of his work-shorts for the whole world to see so she put the lemonade and chips on the bonnet (hood) and said "honey, I'll just adjust you" and proceeded to tuck her "husband's" old fella into his shorts. The man screamed and bumbed his head under the car. The woman then realised it wasn't her husband and dying with embarrasement ran into the house knocking the drink and chips over as she fled. This was only 5 minutes before I, the Assistant parish priest, had arrived.
Amused at what I had been told I then carried out my original task to visit the husband and wife and went to the front door and carried the lemonade and chips. "Who is it" the wife called out as I rang the door-bell. "It's me , Father .........., I've got your lemonade and chips." I then heard a crashing noise and later found out when the husband returned and gained entry to the home that his wife had fainted having thought it was the local priest whom she had "assisted."
|March 6th, 2007||#6|
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True stories are always the best.
"It doesn't take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle." - Norman Schwarskopf, Commander of Desert Storm Operations
|March 8th, 2007||#7|
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not entirely appropriate for a priest if you ask me padre.
And shepards we shall be
For thee, My Lord, for thee
Power hath descended forth from thy hand
That our feet may quickly carry out thy command
So we shall flow a river forth to thee
And teeming with souls shall it ever be
In nomini Patri, et Fili, Spiritus Sancti