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Rob, "don't ask don't tell" is tolerance without necessarily going into acceptance.
Non tolerance whatsoever would be to hunt down homosexuals and have them jailed or whatnot. Tolerance is the allowing of a certain behavior as long as they don't make a fuss out of it. The word tolerance somewhat implies that although it isn't really normal behavior, it will be tolerated whereas acceptance pretty much says what it is, it is now considered normal.
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