| Post; Top Ten Signs A Police Officer Is Too Fat
Traded his police cruiser for a Good Humor truck
On drug busts he's the battering ram
Uses powdered sugar to dust for prints
Once tasered a guy at McDonald's for skimping on the special sauce
He gets winded during roll call
Known as "New York's Tubbiest"
Decided to join writers' strike just for the free donuts
His "nightstick" is a pepperoni -- come on, that's ridiculous!
Calls for backup to help him get out of his squad car
Looks in the mirror and says, "Ok, break it up"
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