I know people who have a romantized idea about the military..
And naw, I can't say I have it in that way..
I have talked to people who have gone the 7-11 months training.
I know it sounds like that I have that romantic idea..
But I don't, and especielly not to go into war. That would be my worst fear, I have feared that alot.
To see these things that happens would be the worst thing in my life.
But what I mean is, You rely on the ones you work with and when relying on your weapon is to rely on yourself.
I wasn't THAT depressed last night, but I want a work that I can focus on.
I love to give my soul and heart when I work.
And I know it sounds romantized when I tell stuff..
But all mechanic things, no matter gun or car I trust it with my heart.
Because when the day comes you can't trust your car or weapon and it doesn't wor.
It's no ones elses fault then yours.
When I was like 4-5 years old, Dudes, I remembers this like it was last night.
Well, The night was dark and everything was stormy.. The lightning struck down like it hated us.. We lived right out in nowhere, on a hill.. So when it struck the house or around the house it sounded like the bang was beside me, like 5 inches from me. I was scared and the one thing I turned to because I was scared and cryin was to grab my pillow and go to the Ford Granada outside to sleep in the backseat..
Wich I did.. And I slept like a baby.. This is a true story..
I never EVER have came to a person when sad..
I went to a car to clean it or do something.. Or went to a dog, cat.. Just some animals..
The military job fits me in more places..
I like to be outside, even if it's snow or raining..
I love to live in the nature..
Well, It's hard to explain..
But one thing for sure, is that I hate to shoot at living things.
I have been out hunting, and the friend of mom USED to bring me..
Because, I have been shotting with air-rifle.. I think it's called so in english..
And the first time I shot with the air rifle, I got almost high scores in the air-rifle club.
Well, So this friend brought me to hunt, we went down to a field and waited out the animals..
This day of some reason, there where both deers and rabbits..
As well as birds..
He wanted me to go first and shoot..
I didnt want to shoot the deer..
So I picked the rabbit, I aimed in the grass and just felt this "STOP" feeling.
I had a clear shot, but to shoot that rabbit was to use my power in a bad way.
I had no reason to shoot that rabbit, it hadn't done me anything.
I just stood up instead and looked to the hunter and told him.
I will never ever aim on something unless threathened..
And explained to him that I didn't need to food from the rabbit, or the hono0ur.
the honour in that is to know where to draw the line from using you power over someones elses life rightfully.
So I don't know..
Well sometimes I can get a little excited over the military.. And that's my idiot thing..
But other from that, I am very psychological of me, and I don't do things witout counting out every conesequense of it.
Now I feel like I am just rabbling on..
I will end this post to reply on yours later.. :P
Anyways, The hunter don't like me on the hunting field anymore..
Just before I think of to much things and the consequenses for my actions..
I think my b/f don't like that side either..